Extreme Prejudice
by OnlyAtNight
Summary: Captain Granger Royal Artillery Troop Commander. Trained to kill, but can she survive romancing Severus Snape?
1. Being Captain Granger

**Extreme Prejudice.**

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**Disclaimer**: The copyright to Harry Potter belongs exclusively to J K Rowling. Good for her too.

**Summary:** Captain Granger - Royal Artillery Troop Commander. Ready to kick some Riddle butt.

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**Chapter 1**

**Being Captain Granger.**

It's funny how everyone defines me as a He. Yes Captain, they say; salute me; follow my orders. They even call me Sir not Maam as they should. No eye contact, eyes always straight ahead, rigid and unmoving. I'm a sexless uniformed Gestapo agent waiting to kill or maim everyone I see. That's what they think, they don't see I'm the Gryffindor Sex Goddess swathed in khaki oozing sex appeal and able to pleasure every available man with my skills in fellatio learned in the trenches of this damning existence.

I suppose I was like that when I was a raw recruit too. Always so afraid to step out of line and bring dishonour on my squad as I knew that everyone would suffer from my stupidity. It didn't take me long to learn that lesson and bury my know-it-all attitude that I'd had as a student at Hogwarts. Sure I was still a very keen learner and rose through the ranks very quickly with honours and distinction, youngest platoon leader at the Academy, but I learnt to hold my tongue. Getting some good bashings from my fellow cadets soon taught me the lessons that 7 years of detentions and the odd cold shoulder from Ron and Harry at Hogwarts couldn't.

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I suppose you're wondering what I'm doing in the Muggle military. I'd like to imagine it was a funny story just waiting to be told, or I just fell into it but no, it was nothing like that. When I finished at Hogwarts, smartest witch of my age and all that palaver, I just didn't know what I wanted to do with myself.

There were the routine offers from the Ministry of Magic to be a desk jockey, being a friend of the-boy-who-lived helped, but I had to look outside of the square. Even though my parents are dentists and run their own successful practice that sort of thing didn't appeal either. Dad wanted me to go to Med. school, but nah, just couldn't do that either. I guess I needed some adventure in my life and a purpose, give me a goal and I'll run it down until it's all done and finished. That's me.

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My Uncle Norm was my quiet confidant. Mum's Brother Norman, a real man's man. Fought in Vietnam and Desert Storm, coordinated the clean up campaigns in Bosnia, now he was a CO with NATO. When I'd spent some of my school leave with him he'd often take me off on a cadet camp and I'd learn all about strategy, comradeship and being needed. Norm was a great bloke, and he knew I was a witch because he saw me perform some wandless magic one night and then got me to talk about it. I was afraid I'd end up in Hangar 51, or whatever the British version was, but he was so cool about it. I think he was dead proud of my achievements and told me some stories about his Great Aunt Amy and how she could do stuff like me. Seems it's a recessive gene in our family after all. Uncle Norm can predict things and has a gift that I think would make him a good seer if he trained up a bit. He was politely interested so I lent him a couple of my old texts from the failed classes I'd had with Professor Trelawny, I think I might have told him to "Broaden his mind" at one point before having a fit of giggles.

I'd decided that I wanted to learn as much as I could about military strategy so I could be of use to the Order of the Phoenix and help to destroy the reign of Tom Riddle.

* * *

Norm had a contact who organised to have my academic record recognised by the Department of Defence. It was all very hush-hush, the Minister of Magic was actually very good about it and spoke to Headmistress McGonagall on my behalf. I managed to get a scholarship to Sandhurst Military Academy, and now at the ripe old age of 26 I'm a Commissioned Officer, a Royal Artillery Troop Commander with a squad of 12 mixed sex soldiers under my command. So here I am, Captain Granger, a seasoned soldier having served in Iraq and Afghanistan, with commando skills, a talent for tactical planning and the ability to lead a squadron into a war zone.

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But am I ready to face Lord Voldemort. That was the million-dollar question, were any of us ready to face the Dark Lord and finally kill his sorry arse.

Of course we'd kicked old Mouldy Arse before, but we'd never managed to vanquish the evil bastard. All those times we'd tried, even with the horcrux adventure back in 7th year, we didn't feel we were any closer to destroying the Dark Wizard that was worshipped by so many stupid mongrels in the Wizarding world. As with any Messiah or Prophet, there were always those who were willing to follow until they died, and die they did. Unfortunately for those of us on the opposing team we suffered casualties as well.

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The Order of the Phoenix had my parents in and out of safe houses so much that they just decided to move to the United States permanently. They were on a magical witness protection programme and I didn't see them too often. My family at home was Uncle Norm and his wife Janet. Janet was a real brick, though she thought the whole "_Herms is a witch_" thing was just a joke Norm had come up with to explain my uncontrollable hair. We played along with this, one less thing to stress out Janet was always a winner from Norm's perspective. She was a fine military wife, his uniforms were always immaculate, meals hot and arms ready with her love. It made me happy to know that they were such a good couple, always made me sigh and wonder if I could find a male version of Janet to fawn over me and iron my uniforms. I hated ironing.

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As far as having a love life went, well it hasn't been good I'm afraid. I've had the odd lover, mostly odd they were too. Ron ended up marrying Luna Lovegood when he finally cottoned on to the fact that I was married to my uniform. They had 3 bouncy red headed kids. Harry has a love hate relationship with Ginny Weasley. I'd dated Charlie Weasley a few times but it ended badly when I took down three Death Eaters single-handed that had attacked us in Hogsmeade one day. I think I hurt his pride a bit, he preferred working with dragons after that rather than women.

Some of Uncle Norm's NATO mates think I'm pretty hot, as only military men can, because I can out arm-wrestle them. My whiskey drinking skills are also legendary. A uniform is a turn on, not a turn off (must be the bravery braids), and we could play dress ups by exchanging berets (blue for green). Be still my beating heart.

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However, sometimes a woman can have that life changing experience that defines a turning point in her existence. I remember the exact moment it happened to me.

I was under sniper fire in Iraq and holed in with my squad for 6 hours in a burnt out building. We were taking turns to do the watch trying to shoot the sneaky bastard before he shot us first. I got talking to Lieutenant Stadley, one of the female soldiers under my command, and we talked about love and life. She pulled out the obligatory family photo's of her 3 year old daughter who now lived with her estranged husband and his mother. She still loved him and after the stress of being under attack like this decided she would take up his offer to try again. I promised to help her fill out the paper work for an office job closer to home. She was a fine soldier but at 26 she was jaded by a whole country full of people who didn't know if they wanted to stone her to death or kiss her. That sort of life can get a tad trying after a while believe you me. I also didn't want to be the person to explain to the child why her mother wasn't coming home again.

It was then that I decided what I really wanted was a Wizard husband and magical children.

Kids on broomsticks and weekend quidditch matches.

Dinners in Diagon Alley, nights at Godric's Hollow or the Burrow, magical balls and equally magical sex.

A dress that wasn't in any recognisable shade of green.

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Unfortunately at my age, even though I was only 26, most Wizards were taken. I was an old spinster and would only be a good catch for a decrepit old man who fancied my muscles. There was also the small problem of me living in the Muggle world, I never took the time to meet any Wizards let alone date any. Maybe I'd Owl some of my old girlfriends from school who I still kept in contact with, surely Lavender or Padma could invite me to some places where I could be seen and maybe meet some guys with the qualities I was after. A pulse was the first quality I wanted, maybe more for a second date like his own teeth.

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I ended the siege by casting a dillusionment charm on myself when I'd told the squad I was popping out back for a pee. I then apparated up to the adjacent roof top and garroted the sniper. I hate snipers.

I also hate using magic in my work just in case I get caught. Bugger it though, what's the use of being a witch if I can't use the occasional magic, especially if it's to get my squad out alive. I'm a Troop Commander first, then a Witch second. Sometimes the lines that cross the two worlds just get a bit blurry and life slips into shades of gray.

On the flip side, like Gilderoy Lockhart, I'm pretty handy with memory charms.

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**Authors note:** I had wanted to make Hermione an Officer in the Royal Marines but discovered that due to a Court of Justice ruling a few years back the "…_Royal Marines, as special combat units pursuing activities for which sex is a determining factor, are entitled to exclude women_." The case related to a female army chef who applied for a Marines job but was knocked back as their chefs are required to be combat ready.

Also it would not be unusual for her to be a Captain at 26 – the recruiting site for Sandhurst Military Academy states that "_You should rise through the rank of Lieutenant and Captain within 2 to 5 years, when you will have the opportunity to become a Forward Observation Officer, seeking out and engaging enemy targets_…" So with 12 months at the Academy, 6 months of other training and some field experience our Very Bright Gryffindor will make it to Captain by 26.

I know this character may not sound much like the Hermione we know and love, however she is a proud lioness who wants to serve and protect. I've just modeled her a bit on a Tommy-Lee Jones sort of straight laced character. I intend to melt her a bit later on and get her out of her fatigues and into a frock (tres horror!). I'm not sure that she will be willing to exchange her combat boots for sling-backs though.


	2. The Colour of Khaki

**Chapter 2**

**The Colour of Khaki.**

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The sniper incident was just one of many things that defined my tour of duty. If it wasn't a sniper then it was riots, road blocks, kidnappings, arson attacks or suicide bombers. Iraq was a lot of things, but it wasn't a party town. The British were lucky though, they didn't seem to draw the animosity that the American soldiers did. I tried to stick to the Australians when we had a choice of companion patrols, they were excellent in a crunch and always had time for an impromptu game of cricket. The Americans didn't seem to get cricket, it wasn't my sport either but it kept my people happy. That was what it was all about, a happy team was less stressed and easier to keep disciplined.

We've been here for 3 months of 24/7 constant vigilance. Mad Eye Moody would have been proud to know someone had finally listened to him. Unfortunately, Lieutenant Stadley took a load of shrapnel to her left side from a mine and had to be bugged out to the Gulf. Thank Kevlar for small mercies, Stadley would live, but probably have aches in bad weather. That would make the transfer a moot issue now, it was either a desk job or a war pension. In a way Stadley was lucky, lots of people lost their lives both uniformed and civilian (and they still are). One week later my squad was sent home for a well earned break. Home was beckoning and I answered the call with a spring in my well worn boots.

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Back at the base after debriefing we were given 6 weeks paid leave. Everyone had somewhere to be and I packed my essentials in to a kit before making my way on the tube to the Leaky Cauldron. I'd called ahead to Tom the Publican and booked a room for a few nights until I decided if I needed to be somewhere else or with someone else.

No one but Tom knew I was coming, so when I walked in I simply dropped my kit behind the bar before taking off my hat and scraping my nails through my short wavy hair (It was easier to control lice with short hair and a regulation cut was also easy to manage). In my tidy dress uniform I cut quite a figure and most people in the pub stopped their drinking to watch me open-mouthed. It wasn't every day a Muggle soldier walked in off the street to have a drink at the Cauldron. Stretching, I cracked my back successfully with a satisfied grunt and wandered over to the bar.

"_Tom, how about a whiskey_"

Tom stared at me for a short moment before the look of recognition broke his battered face into a wide toothless grin.

"_Mistress Granger, it's on the house maam_" he said loud enough for everyone to hear as he placed a freshly polished shot glass on the bar and filled it to the brim.

"_Thanks Tom, you're a hero_" I said taking the drink and slamming it back smiling widely at the Wizard. I placed the glass on the bar nodding my head at him "_Better make it another I've got some catching up to do"._

The second drink hadn't quite made it to my lips when I was lifted bodily off the floor from behind and spun around in the air. The only sound that came out of my mouth was a " _Woomp_" as the air was shoved out of my lungs and the heavily gripped glass sprayed whiskey over the floor in a wide arc. When I hit the floor again I spun around defensively to meet a giant of a man with a huge shaggy beard and a foul hairy suit. _"Fuck, what a sight."_

"_MyKnee, how are you little one_" It was Hagrid and luckily not a wild beserker. "_Hardly recognised you in your uniform. Bin a long time eh?_"

I looked up into the black beetle eyes, the smiling face and the ever so shaggy hair "_Agrid_" was all I managed to choke out before grabbing him around the middle and shoving my face into his broad belly.

So much for the stoic war veteran, here I was reduced to an 11-year-old girl again.

He patted my back with a huge hand rocking me from side to side as I held on for grim death and buried my face in his beard. Merlin it was disgusting, but so bloody nice.

"_Now now my girl_" he crooned "_Come and have a drink and tell old Agrid all about it eh_".

He led me to a table near the fireplace, inquisitive hands reaching out and touching me as I passed like a lucky talisman. This was Granger the friend of Potter and they all wanted a little bit of that magic for themselves.

"_Do they know you're here, why are you alone MyKnee_" he asked gently "_Are you on_" he lowered his voice whilst looking around the public bar and murmured "_a secret mission_?"

"_No Hagrid_" I wiped an errant tear from near my eye and laughed "_Just got back from Iraq last week and I'm on 6 weeks leave from today. I'm here at the Cauldron for a couple of days to reacclimatize then I might owl the Weasleys, maybe Hogwarts_" I lowered my voice to a whisper looking at the table top "_maybe no one_,_ thought I'd wait and see_".

Two Butterbeers floated over to our table courtesy of a smiling Witch. We both nodded in appreciation and downed the tasty brew as we caught up. I filled him in on my life as he nodded, drank and made the occasional "_Mmm_" sounds. Hagrid was an exceptionally good listener.

When I stopped chatting to take a drink Hagrid commented "_Didn't never imagine our little MyKnee would become a Cap'n and be leading a troop like that. You done us proud girl, I'm chuffed for ya_."

"_Course I been reading that military paper you got me a 'scription for, saw your picture in it when you got promoted. Mighty proud of ya I can say_" he nodded his head in that way that people do to emphasise a point. I had always thought it one of his endearing traits. "_Showed it to the Headmistress and all_." he said. "_I've shown the Headmistress all your photo's and letters too, I reckon you got the most interesting job of any of her ex students_."

We stopped our talk as 2 glasses of fire whiskey drifted onto our table courtesy of another pub patron. Nodding our thanks again I knew that if this kept up I'd be snickered in no time.

"_Thanks Hagrid, that means a lot to me" _I said in appreciation of his open honesty.

I sighed then and he tightened his grip on my hand sensing my pain_ "Its just been so long, I feel out of touch with the magical community. I haven't been back since Ron got married."_ I confided to my giant friend.

"_Ah, yes Ron"_ he mused stroking his beard_ "Don't ya worry lass, stay here for a coupla days, take some walks in the Alley out back, get ya self reacquainted and all. I'll come and collect you Saturday night for the Halloween Ball at Ogwarts and you can meet everyone and catch up. It'll be good for ya, get yourself a new dress and your hair done nice and let all your worries slip away_".

The way Hagrid looked at me I could tell that he knew the horrors that lay just beneath the surface. I remember seeing him battered and bruised before and knew the pain he'd suffered trying to win over the Giants to the Light side a few years ago. As a member of the Order, Hagrid had fought against dark wizards all his adult life and we had a quiet understanding.

Maybe it was the way he held my hand in his massive one, the knitting of those heavy brows or the concern in the black eyes. Whatever it was I found myself agreeing with him, sure I'll come to Hogwarts, I'd love to go to the Ball and of course I'll definitely play dress ups. Why not, Baghdad seemed far away and the tension was slipping away with each glass we consumed that quiet afternoon.

Maybe I'll get lucky on Saturday and meet the Wizard of my dreams and dance the night away on a gossamer cloud of love (or lust). If nothing else I'd have a nice new dress, all those hard earned pounds were burning a hole in my Gringott's account and it was time to spend up on myself. A pedicure would do wonders for my battle weary feet as well. I wiggled my toes in anticipation of the pleasure that was to come.

"_It's a plan Hagrid, I'll do it. I'll apperate to Hogsmeade and walk up to the castle Saturday, but promise me you'll keep it a secret OK. I want to surprise everyone_" I firmly gripped his hand with my right, kept eye contact until he nodded slightly then I downed my last shot of whiskey.

"_Bottom's up then_."

Hagrid did as he was told downing his drink in one gulp then rose up to his feet "_Time to go back to Ogwarts then, you settle into your room and get some rest. There's a whole day of pampering ahead of you tomorrow_" he winked good-naturedly.

He lent over me and plopped a big noisy kiss on the top of my head before ruffling my hair and flooing out via the fireplace. "_Saturday then_" were his parting words. I nodded, sure why not. It was Wednesday today, that gave me three days to prepare.

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The room was just as I remembered all the Cauldron rooms to be. A quick spell made the mattress more comfortable than the bowed and smelly antique that I'd first spied. There was no way I was going to sleep on anything but crisp cotton sheets after 3 months on a burlap fold-down. It was an easy spell and was followed by a quick conjuring of flowers and incense to cleanse the room. Luxury, pure luxury. I'd intended to lie down for a quick nap, but when I awoke it was already morning. Morpheus my lover had taken me away from the sound of mortar and gun fire to a place that was soft and flower scented.

It was Thursday morning and I took a leisurely shower before dressing in my favourite pair of well-faded Levi's and a desert beige t-shirt. I was in no hurry and left for a quiet walk through Diagon Alley and a real breakfast at a near by café (I was sick of army rations and hastily grabbed meals). My squishy brown boat shoes made a nice change from the combat boots I'd all but slept in these last few months. The dog tags that hung openly from my neck (proclaimed me to be _Granger, Captain_, the property of Her Majesty's Government, blood type O negative, serial no. 6251AJ98765) and my Divers watch (a gift from Headmaster McGonagall when I graduated from Sandhurst engraved with her best wishes) was my only jewelry.

Diagon Alley had changed a fair bit since I last shopped here. I walked the full length of the main drag noting shops I would visit later and stopped at Gringott's to fill my money bag and exchange some pounds for gold galleons. Returning the way I'd come my first stop was the Owl Post-Office.

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"_Dear Molly & Arthur_,

I'm staying at the Leaky Cauldron for a few days. I met up with Hagrid and he invited me to the Alumni Halloween ball at Hogwarts this Saturday night. Do you think you will be there? It would be so nice to catch up while I'm on leave.

I'd like my arrival to be a surprise to the boys, Ron & Harry, so please try not to tell them that I'm coming. Of course, if the temptation is too great then who am I to deny you the pleasure of hinting at a Gryffindor Old Girl visiting the castle.

If your offer is still standing, then I'd also like to spend a few days next week at the Burrow with you both so I can show you some photo's from my trip and chat again like old times.

_All the best, with love as always_

_Hermione Granger_."

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"_My Dear Professor_,

I'm currently on leave and am staying at the Cauldron. Merlin it's good to be away from the heat and sand for a while. The Cauldron is utter luxury by comparison although I had to transfigure the bed into something that was not bowed into the middle. Being a Witch sure makes life more bearable. I actually woke this morning to the smell of flowers.

I just wanted you to know how much your correspondences over the last few years have meant to me. I know I've said it all before but I just want to tell you again... it's been so nice to have a non-judgmental friend that I can chat to when the times are lonely or I need to share the small joys that sometimes cross my path. Who would have thought 15 years ago that you would turn out to be the friend that I so craved. It's true that Merlin does indeed move in mysterious ways.

Thank you again for telling me about Abu-Shari, the wizarding town outside of Baghdad in the charming Agrahid Oasis. I hope you enjoyed the Arabic book of spells and potions that I sent to you and the hand woven cape. It's beautiful material isn't it and quite creatively woven with protection and good luck spells. Maybe I should have bought one for myself while I was there too? I wonder if they make flak jackets in shade of khaki (just joking!).

It will be nice to see you again soon and have a good chat. Perhaps we can try some of the potions in the new book if you'd like to, but of course only if you have the time.

I'm off for 6 weeks and, if the offer still stands, I'd like to spend a week or two at S/E just to unwind and escape from reality. Would that be alright? I promise not to invade your privacy, I just need somewhere to pull on a floppy robe and frolic in a field of sunflowers. How "_Yellow Brick Road_" does that sound? Hopefully without the "_Ding Dong_" song.

Would you believe the first person I ran into (after Tom the Publican) was Hagrid? How's that for travelling incognito, if he was an assassin I would be dead. For such a huge man he's remarkably quiet on his feet. So, the crux of this is that it looks like I'm going to Hogwarts for the Halloween ball on Saturday night. I don't suppose you would be so kind as to save a dance for me?

_Much love_

_Granger_."

A few sickles later and my friends knew I was still around, alive and kicking.


	3. Oh Yes, that feels so good!

**Chapter 3**

**Oh Yes, That Feels So Good!**

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My feet seemed to move on their own after the Post-Office and I soon found myself standing in front of Weazleys Wizarding Weezles. I peered through the window and noticed that business was a bit slow. I'd always loved Fred and George, they were true characters and their legend would live on for eternity naming them as the Masters of the Prank. There weren't any red shocks of hair in the shop and after waiting for the customers to leave I decided to pop in and see if the lads were about and fancied a cup of tea.

When I walked in there was a rather tartly dressed young girl behind the counter with lilac, green and orange streaked hair. She was leaning on the counter like she needed all the support she could get. Picking idly at her nails and chewing bubble gum, occasionally blowing a bubble for her own entertainment, she looked like an absolute moron.

I walked up to the counter and was ignored. Clearing my throat in my best Dolores Umbridge fashion I waited for the Tart to notice me. She continued to ignore my presence. Stupid bitch. A bit of shock tactics were in order, no one ignored Hermione Granger.

"_Excuse me are the Misters Weazley here_"

"_Eh_" she replied in a distasteful accent looking up finally and blowing a bubble "_Ooo are you then that wants ta know_?".

"_I'm a friend of the family_" I say "_Where are George and Fred Weazley_?"

"_I dunno_" she says distractedly "_Out I s'pose, dunno when they'll be back_."

Sizing her up all I could think was she probably came out of Hogwarts with all Trolls in her Owls. Probably a Slytherin by the looks of her too. I think of my friend Sergeant Petersen, he'd love to give her hell and would break her like a matchstick in 5 minutes flat. I smile widely, when did I become such a fucking sadist.

"_What's your name girl_" I demand in a sickly sweet tone.

"_Nadia_" that's it, just a name. She pops a bubble in my face. Bad move.

I lean over the counter and grab Nadia by the front of her shirt. My best sneer is in place and I growl like a rabid dog.

"_Don't fuck with me little girl_" my rage builds at the Tart, she starts to levitate as I drag her up onto the counter by the collar, her eyes grow spectacularly round, I can smell her fear. It smells good. Her mouth opens in a silent cry and the bubble gum floats out and smears itself into her hair.

"_Where. Are. The. Brothers. Weazley_." I ask slowly and punctuate each word with venom.

She looks really frightened now "_Just out for some breakfast Miss, they'll be back in 30 minutes. Do you want to wait, I can make you some tea_." Cowardly pathetic bitch, I sneer at her some more.

Then I release her collar and she collapses before slipping off the counter to the floor in a heap.

"_Don't bother really, I'll just pop back later_" I lean over the counter and give her the smile I save for other people's grandmothers.

"_By the way, you have gum in your hair_" I turn to leave the shop.

With my hand on the knob I hear her mutter "_Fucking Bitch_" as she gets back to her feet.

At this I turn and snap my fingers "_control_" I mutter under my breath and I hear her groan.

"_Have a nice day_" I say and leave the store pausing to look back through the window. She's lifting her shirt to look at her tight white trousers in disgust. I see the growing wet patch that comes from the loss of control of ones bladder.

I can't stop the self-satisfied grin that forms on my face. Vengeance is mine sayeth I. That particular spell, one of my own, was a real showstopper and I knew that it could stop a grown man in his tracks and was also mostly harmless. Yes, I was a bitch of the highest order. Hermione Granger, _Order of the Bitch First Class_. I keep that medal with my Order of Merlin, only bringing it out for special occasions.

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Walking along a bit further, with a definite spring to my step, a sign caught my eye - a beauty parlour! Just what the Queen ordered for her most faithful servant. Who could say no to Her Majesty, so I slipped inside to see if they could fit me in at short notice.

A woman with shoulder length wavy blonde hair popped her head around the curtain when the bell on the door sounded. There was something familiar about her, who was she I wondered. She walked into the front waiting area and looked me right in the eye.

"_Hermione Fucking Granger_" she said in astonishment, rushing at me and grabbed me by the upper arms in a death grip.

"_Lavender Fucking Brown_" I replied grabbing her back by the elbows.

I couldn't believe it, we both started to bounce up and down on the spot and when she started to squeal I joined in. Another head, black haired this time, popped around the curtain.

Lavender stopped bouncing and turned to the dark headed girl and said simply "_It's Hermione_"

The dark haired girl squealed too and I knew this must be Padma Patil.

"_Shit_" she said as she rushed to join in the gripping and bouncing "_I'd heard you joined a convent or something like that when Ron dumped you_" she managed to say between bounces.

I stopped bouncing. They both noticed and stopped too slightly later than I dropping their hands and backing off a step just in case I exploded. I swear they almost died of shock when instead of blowing my top I laughed loudly.

"_We've got some catching up to do Ladies_".

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It was just shy of midday so Lavender and Padma closed up the shop for lunch. We went to a nice little café in a side street off Diagon Alley. They had lots to tell me and chatted non-stop for 40 minutes about men, work and general gossip.

Lavender and Padma had gone into business together and ran the beauty parlour and hair salon. Business wasn't too bad, though it was obvious to them both that they wouldn't become millionaires through waxing and plucking the Wizarding world. It was a comfortable income though and they did enjoy the work.

So finally they got around to telling me that the gossip was that Ron had dumped me. Apparently I was a lousy lay and too clingy, so that's why he took up with Luna. She, of course, didn't have a bad thing to say about me and had not collaborated Ron's far-fetched lies. With me being absent for so many years no one was able to defend my honour, so to speak.

Suffice to say I put them straight and told them about my life. I also told them in no uncertain terms that Ron was the dud root, not me. I dropped him because I didn't want to be a baby breeding machine. To their credit they listened attentively, oohed and aahed at the right times and were very gentle in their steering towards the question of my current love life.

Love life, I'd snorted at that. I told them that I could only have a love life if it was government issued. When I needed a root I'd bought a stud for a few hours. Last time I'd been laid it was a birthday present from the girls in the Officers Club, I think his name was Ernesto or some such, something Spanish. Was that disgust on Lavender's face. Yes, I think it was. I told them that I was hoping they might know an eligible wizard or two I could take for a drink as it was about time I looked for a mate.

Padma's face lit up, I knew that look it said _here was a challenge_. "_Can you come for a drink at the Magic Lantern Bar tomorrow night. They have Karaoke._" She trilled. I couldn't believe Padma actually trilled – ugh!

Hmm, Friday night Karaoke. Perhaps I could die of Ebola in the interim and not have to disgrace myself. The last memory I have of my singing in public was after a few too many tequila slammers in the company of the boys from NATO. They'd been good enough to capture it on video for my later perusal. Luckily there was also footage of Uncle Norm singing_"In the Navy_" at the end of the tape so it tended to negate my pain to a small degree. Perhaps this was a genetic fault I'd been previously unaware of – instant arsehole, just add alcohol!

"_Sure, why not_" did I really just say I'd go. Time for a psychiatric discharge, surely even Klinger from MASH wasn't that insane?

The girls giggled and whispered together conspiratorially "_We'll pick you up at the Cauldron at 8 OK_?"

I agree and then ask them for the full works at their salon. Padma actually looks like she's been asked to the ball by the Prince himself – they drag me back to the Salon offering to take me dress shopping afterwards. It seems "_The Works_" is indeed the complete works, frocks included. There goes Thursday. Beauty, apparently, waits for no woman.

I console myself with the thought that I can always go to Flourish and Blotts tomorrow for a long languid browse of the bookshelves.

* * *

Come 6 pm I find myself walking back to the Cauldron to deposit my shopping and inspect my new self in the privacy of my hotel room.

The girls had been quite thorough with me that day. I had been waxed, eyebrows to ankles; massaged, head to toe; snipped, coloured, painted and dressed up. I looked good! It had been worth every galleon that I'd spent.

At the dress shop I assured the girls that, even though it was Halloween, I had no intention of dressing like a dominatrix in public – though leaving off the news that I had done so in private before. We managed to settle on a tasteful yet still somewhat sexy black silk dress and low sling back heels. I did give in on the stay up fishnet stockings at the lingerie shop and some rather delicate underwear that I simply adored. The black detachable fairy wings made the dress into a costume and suitable for Halloween at Hogwarts.

As I was intending to spend my leave in the magical community it was also decided that I should buy 3 quite lovely witchy style dresses in a variety of colours. I favoured crushed velvet and bell sleeves and felt wistful at my image in the mirror. This could be my life away from khaki, velvet and silk with cute push up bras. Have my hips always looked that broad, can't say that I'd really noticed before – must be because I always wear trousers - very body minimalising.

* * *

I hoped that Tom didn't have pea soup on at the Cauldron again for dinner, I fancied a steak for a change. All that hunting and gathering in the Alley made one rather hungry for a catch n' kill feast.

Pea soup was on, so I was off. There had to be a steak house somewhere off Diagon Alley just waiting for me to come in and demolish a whole steer. Tom pointed me in the direction of the _Howdy Pardner_ bar that was owned, he said in a low whisper, by Americans. Shock Horror, what was Diagon Alley coming to!

I sauntered in to the Tex Mex palace and headed directly for a table seated with two men that I'd recognise anywhere. Fred and George Weazley, the night was looking up.


	4. Deliver me from evil

**Chapter 4**

**Deliver me from evil…**

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* * *

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Thanking all the gods that another teaching day was over, Severus Snape slipped away to his private rooms to relax until dinner at 6 pm. Luckily he had not scheduled any detentions tonight so he was at leisure to sit back and contemplate the cosmos. This had been a strange week, the student populace had been unusually well behaved, though he dreaded the fact that there was still Friday to come. His world of quiet contemplation could explode in a haze of disaster tomorrow just as easily as it could any other day.

He always pretended to hate being a teacher, but it was his job and he was good at it. Year after year he attempted to teach the art of potions making to Hogwarts students trying desperately to instill in them a love of the subtle science. Unfortunately he considered himself lucky when he found one student who excelled at the art. Foolish wand waving was the preferred study, instant gratification being just as prevalent in school as in the real world. Waiting for a potion to brew, the excitement and anticipation was often lost on these children, dunderheads all of them.

* * *

Making himself a whiskey and soda, Severus sat on his sofa and picked up the days mail that Dobby had undoubtedly left. Magazine renewals, a lonely-hearts letter inviting him to join the fabulous world of dating (as if), a post card from Draco Malfoy on a business trip in Holland, and a plain blue envelope. He turned this one over a few times as if to guess what was written within. It was addressed to "_Snape Esq., Hogwarts_". Simple and to the point, he admired that. Hoping that he had no unpaid bills he'd overlooked Severus ran his nail under the back flap breaking the red wax seal, a simple yet tasteful pentagram.

It began, "_My Dear Professor"_, and he relaxed back into his seat to read the latest from his favourite ex-student as he sipped his drink.

* * *

Hermione Granger, where to start. She was an incredibly intelligent, bushy haired, know-it-all child of Muggle parentage. He had tried to ignore her like so many other students that had gone before her, and who would come later. When had it happened, when did they become friends.

Perhaps it was the later years and all the time spent in Grimauld Place, the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix, with those bratty teenaged children. He'd seen her grow from an 11-year-old insecure child to an 18-year-old complex woman. Somewhere, he hadn't noticed when, she had grown up and out becoming a woman right before his eyes. Strangely she had also acquired a unique personality unsullied by her constant companions the Weazley boy and The-Boy-Who-Lived-to-Annoy-Him. Although he knew that she possessed a certain cunning that would have made her a great Slytherin, he also admired her more Gryffindor qualities of courage and honour.

When her parents had gone into witness protection in the US, Hermione had spent more time with Severus and he suspected she missed a father figure in her life. Albus encouraged their friendship and although he at first found the idea abhorrent he soon learnt that Miss Granger was a joy to have around. Not only was she intelligent, articulate and mature, she also made an excellent potions assistant. Many an evening in her last year of school found her in his company in the dungeons discussing the classics, the latest potions magazine or helping brew a more complex potion that required two people to work together. Sometimes she simply curled up on his settee with a book until she fell asleep in his quiet company before the fire.

He'd hoped she would stay on as his potions apprentice, but it was with sadness on his behalf that she decided to further her interest in military strategy in the hope of offering something back to the Wizard community in the fight against He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Named. He long suspected that her personal vendetta against the Dark Lord stemmed from his own slavery to the fiend and her desire to set him free. Just like the ill-fated and short lived SPEW of her youth. Over farewell drinks she had cried and told him that she was doing it for him, partly drunken banter and partly a heartfelt confession of her need to save him. It was disturbing but so very like the Hermione that he had grown fond of.

* * *

The latest picture enclosed with the short letter was of Hermione in full desert camouflage uniform, including helmet, aviator glasses and a pistol at her hip. Slung over her shoulder was an automatic assault rifle. Standing beside her was an old woman dressed in black clothes. The landscape was stark and bright. It was a wizard photo so it moved – as he watched the older woman put her hand on Hermione's arm getting her attention, she turned to her and removed her helmet, taking off her glasses she smiled at the woman in a most sincere manner. The woman smiled back and handed her a black garment which Hermione took with reverence before bowing to the woman. The older woman wiped a tear from her own eye, touched Hermione on the cheek, and then the whole scene replayed itself. Turning the picture over Severus noted the caption, "_This is the woman who wove the cape that I sent to you, she sends her best wishes for your long and happy life. Love HG_."

He watched the photo replay a few times, each time seeing something he had missed the previous time. Her name tag, simply _Granger_; the coloured bars showing she was a decorated officer; sleeves rolled neatly up past the elbows; the simple diamond ear studs that he had given her as a graduation present from Sandhurst. He touched the photo, running his hand down her face, she smiled at him. The smile was so genuine and the kindness towards the older woman said it all, Hermione, for all her rough uniformed exterior, was a good woman and he was glad she was his friend.

* * *

Rising from the sofa he took the photo over to his mantle piece where there were other "_family_" pictures. A photo of Draco and his son Damien, Severus holding the small boy at the naming ceremony; The Order of the Phoenix before Dumbledore's death – Remus Lupin with his arm around Severus' shoulder trying to get him to stay in the picture; last years annual portrait of the Hogwarts Staff together; He, Albus and Miverva in her animagus form cradled in the former Headmaster's arms; and Hermione – all the photo's she had sent him.

The first was at her graduation. Minerva had taken the photo, a funny moment when Hermione had tried to get Severus to stand behind her before grabbing his arm and making him put her in a mock headlock before she fainted away from the frame, she popped back up and laughed punching him lightly on the arm, he trying to look shocked but failing miserably.

There was a still Muggle photo taken when she was promoted to Captain, a proud dignified head and shoulder shot showing a woman of substance and determination. He then picked up his favourite photo, one that was taken at a dinner they had shared a few years ago.

* * *

He remembered the night clearly even after all these years. Her first posting after graduation had been to the US army base in Japan to learn tactical planning. She'd been there for 6 months and was due to take up her first active post in a peacekeeping mission in Afghanistan. It was Saturday evening just after 6 p.m. He had joined the other professors in the great hall for dinner when the door burst open. In ran a woman dressed in a golden kimono hitching the gown up to her calves. They had all stared not knowing what to think. She ran up to the staff table, kissed both Minerva and Remus on their cheeks before leaning over him and saying "_Come on lets go to dinner_", that was it, lets go to dinner. She'd grabbed his hand and led him through the tables of gaping students and out the door down to the gates before they'd traveled by portkey to Kyoto.

Outside a traditional restaurant she'd transfigured his clothes into a rather nice black silk haori and led him in to meet her friends. It seems she had made contacts in the local magical community and had brought him here to meet a Japanese potions master from the local school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. A charmed badge in the shape of a snake gave him interpreting skills and he was able to hold a very involved conversation with Master Juniko about traditional Japanese potion making. It was his first trip to Kyoto, his first Sushi and his first real kiss from Hermione.

They'd been at the restaurant for 3 hours and after promising to correspond with Master Juniko, exchanging business cards and a gift of _Hogwarts: a history_ (brought by Hermione of course), they had gone for a walk. It was a lovely night and this part of Kyoto was beautiful with the cherry blossoms filling the air with a sweet fragrance.

Walking through the Kyoto night they had held hands and laughed about his new found liking for raw fish, talked about everything and anything. It was so easy to talk with her and in this setting he felt relaxed and at ease. He suspected that the Sake had helped. Finally they were outside the Ryokan Inn where she was staying. Would he like to come in, yes why not.

* * *

In the quiet of her room, she stood with her back to him looking out of the window at the moon. He'd come to stand beside her to enjoy the view, she leant back against him putting her head on his chest. It felt so natural to put his arms around her shoulder, she felt so warm so he hugged her close. It was meant to be just a friendly hug but when he felt her turn in his arms, her warm breath and then the gentle nuzzle of her lips on his neck he couldn't contain the small moan of pleasure that escaped his throat. It was an invitation she couldn't seem to resist, her nuzzling turned into an open mouthed kiss. He moved his head back and she began to kiss his throat then jaw, her hands on his chest, then up into his hair pulling his face down so that their noses were resting together. Her breath was heavy as her lips grazed against his, his resistance broke as he joined her in the gentleness of the touch.

They had explored each other in that kiss, soft and tender. Severus had not remembered the last time a woman had kissed him like that, no demands or expectations, no heavy passions or desperation. Just a kiss that said "_I love you, it's that simple_" without the words. When the kiss finished he opened his eyes and saw a tear running down her cheek, it was then that he knew that there was more to this than a simple kiss.

"_What if I die tomorrow_" she'd whispered "_This isn't a game, these people are playing for keeps Severus_" then her hand touched his face "_I'm afraid_".

He'd told her that if she died her ghost could come back to Hogwarts and live in the Dungeons with him terrorising the first years. When he finally died they could haunt together and make Peeves look like a Girl Guide. Her laugh, that was it, she laughed with him and the spell was broken and they were back as mates again. A hug, a stern warning to watch her butt, use the old Gryffindor courage. His was false bravado, he wanted her alive not dead so he could kiss those lips again one day. The next hug was a loud and boisterous affair not longer soft and filled with longing. Then he was gone, back to the relative safety of Hogwarts.

* * *

The photo on the mantle piece, both of them wearing traditional Japanese dress. Dignified and smiling, he touched the photo and thought how nice it would be having her come to stay at Spinner's End. He'd definitely save her a dance for Saturday night. 


	5. Last dance at the OK Corall

**Chapter 5**

**Last Dance at the OK Corral**

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* * *

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**Authors note:** We all know that Fred & George have the habit of finishing each others sentences – for ease of use I will forward their dialogue with either F or G so you know which clown is juggling, so to speak.

Please also note that Hermione is not an alcoholic, she just likes a drink or two, it's the social thing to do. Brits love their pubs as they will aptly tell you.

I'd also like to thank everyone for the brilliant reviews. You've given me inspiration to keep writing.

* * *

Walking into the _Howdy Pardner_ bar no one noticed me. All eyes were on the band who were predictably playing the theme from _Rawhide_. Luckily this was not a scene from the _Blues Brothers _movie, so no one deemed it necessary to throw beer bottles at the muso's.

"_Gred, Forge_" I used the pet names that Ginny had been so fond of calling her brothers as I slipped into the chair that was conveniently vacant between the brothers slipping an arm over each of their shoulders as I did.

F "_Her_"

G "_Meen_"

F "_eeeee_" they countered in flawless precision enveloping me in a two-sided hug that made breathing somewhat difficult.

F "_We just knew_"

G "_it had to be you_"

F "_yeah based on what_"

G "_Nadia told us_."

They both laughed in unison.

F "_Pathetic wasn't she_"

G "_so we just had to sack her"_

F "_'bout time too_".

I felt bad for the girl, everyone is pretty pathetic at 16, but I was secretly glad. _"Couldn't you give her a second chance_"

F "_No_"

G "_she was stealing from the till_"

F "_you helped us_"

G "_really did_"

"_Mmm, ok, glad I could help. How bout a drink then_" I waved to the waitress and ordered a round of beers, American beers good for growing hairs on the chest.

F "_Besides Mum told us_"

G "_A lost friend was around_"

F "_And we though of you_"

G "_Of course_".

The band played on. A few people drifted to and from the table making small talk, welcoming me back to the real world, backslapping and kissing the brothers. We moved into the restaurant section for a short while where we all ate a hearty meal of char-grilled steaks with salad and a side of jalapeno chilies with guacamole. Culinary heaven by my reckoning, a far cry from freeze-dried Irish stew, and not to mention Tom's pea soup. When the meal was over a tallish well built man approached our table.

G "_Gerry, how's it doing_"

F "_Looking good Pardner_"

Hand shaking ensued then I saw Gerry looked at me expectantly. He smiled and extended his hand.

"_And who might you be little lady_" oh that accent… be still my beating heart.

All I managed was a stupid smile, I think I might have fluttered my eyes at him too. How pathetic.

F "_This, my friend_"

G "_Is Miss Mina_"

Gerry was kissing my hand "_Miss Mina_" he whispered as he raised his eyes to mine. I felt a strange constriction in my chest.

We rose and walked back into the main bar area before Gerry seated us all at a table off to the left of the dance floor.

F "_Gerry is the owner_"

G "_of this fine establishment_" the brothers flourished their hands to either side in emphasis.

* * *

Gerry smiled at me again "_Would you care to dance Miss Mina_" he asked in that smooth voice.

How could I refuse such an offer? He took my hand and we were soon slow dancing to some cowboy love song that I didn't know. I pretty much didn't know anything at this point except his eyes were hazel, his hair was a murky blonde and his hands felt good on my body. He wasn't as tall as I'd originally thought, I was 5' 7" and he was probably just 2 inches taller than me at most.

"_My name's really Hermione_" I told him "_I've know Fred and George since school_".

"_So you're a witch are you_" he said into my hair as we danced slowly "_that's good. I haven't seen you around before_"

"_I'm on holidays so I'm visiting some old friends and haunts for a short while_"

We chatted about nothing in particular as one song drifted into another. I told Gerry that I was in the military and was in town for 6 weeks. He told me that his brother Jake, back home in the States was in the army too, he was non-magical so found it easy to fit into the regime of army life. He was surprised that I managed to do so without "_outing_" myself.

Surprisingly he was easy to talk to and more than easy to hold. At one point we were hardly moving and he was fondling my dog tags as I smiled at him wistfully. It had been a long time since I felt this at ease.

We stopped when a man tapped Gerry on the shoulder and he regretfully went to deal with some business. Fred took his place and we danced a quick jig to some song that had something to do with the Devil and Georgia. The Devil lost the bet.

F "_Fancy our Gerry do you Mina, never seen him dance more than one dance with a lady before_"

The song finished and we sat down to more beer. Gerry took to the stage and announced a talent show. Did any of the audience fancy coming up on stage? The prize was dinner and drinks for the winner and a 50 pound gift certificate to Flourish & Blotts.

George nudged me. "_Do you still play the guitar_" he asked.

I tried to act shy and mumbled that I didn't have mine with me hoping that I would be spared.

Quite a few people took to the stage playing a variety of numbers, some good some not so. A man who looked somewhat like Argus Filch played a jaw harp to the delight of the sodden audience.

Bugger it, I thought after continual nudging from the guys, I might as well go on up and play a piece. It might have been the full strength beer talking, or maybe I just wanted to impress Gerry, but I found myself asking one of the band if I could borrow his guitar. Although I sincerely hated Karaoke I quite liked to sing along to my own guitar playing. An anomaly in my character, but we all have our little peccadilloes.

I sat quietly with the acoustic guitar in a corner and got acquainted with the feel of the instrument. After a few scales and some quiet warbling I felt ready and told the MC that he could put me in the line up. I went back to our table and waited through a couple who sang quite well and I suspected would win with their 60's ballad about nuclear power and dead fish.

George asked me if I could accompany him and Fred if they sang a Stones song later, as I could also play riff's on the electric guitar I accepted the challenge – if they could get me a guitar to play on of course.

* * *

My turn came around sooner than I'd suspected it would. Fueled with a head full of Budweiser I took to the stage and started on my song. Being able to sing and play the guitar had come in handy on duty, as everyone needed a release of tension, the gift of music always broke through the barriers of culture and language in any country. Even if it was just a rousing chorus of "_Click goes the Shears_" with the Aussie Diggers it seemed to bring joy into our sometimes dreary lives.

"_I confess to being a fan of Jack Black & his brother Kyle_" I started "_So this song is a Tribute_".

_This is the greatest and best song in the world_

_Tribute_

_Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here_

_We was hitchhiking down a long a lonesome road_

_All of the sudden_

_There shined a shiny demon_

_In the middle of the road_

_And he said_

_Play the best song in the world or I'll eat your souls_

_Well me and Kyle we looked at each other_

_And we each said_

_OK_

By the time I'd sang the first half of the stanza Gerry had joined me on the stage with an electric guitar and he was playing beside me, finally he sang the "_OK_" with me. Smiling at him I moved aside to allow him to join in the fun, I'd found my Kyle to play with. He was pretty good too and kept time with me without getting in my face or stepping on my toes.

_And we played the first thing that came to our heads_

_Just so happened to be_

_The best song in the world_

_It was the best song in the world_

_Look into my eyes and it's easy to see_

_1 and 1 make 2 2 and 1 make 3_

_It was destiny_

_Once every hundred thousand years or so_

_When the sun doth shine and the moon doth glow_

_And the grass doth grow_

The rest of the song flowed so easily that it became a real joy to be on stage again. Gerry made a great partner and when we finished the song he kissed my cheek, barely missing my lips, as the applause surrounded us. I was a bit stunned, but quite delighted. The kiss was nice and although it didn't leave me gagging for more I did wonder what he'd be like between the sheets. It'd been a long time since I'd had a tumble. Although I didn't know him that well, I'd slept with guys on less friendlier terms. Who knew in my line of work when the grand clock would chime for the last time and my number would finally be up. Love needed to be taken when it was offered, sometimes there wasn't a second offer and it was wise not to say no and live with regrets. It was only one kiss, but maybe if I played my cards, or guitar, right there might be a few more.

* * *

I was leaving the stage when I found my acoustic guitar swapped for an electric and myself turned around bodily and back on stage. Fred whispered in my ear "_Honky Tonk Woman_" and the stage was set for some good old rocking action.

Fred took the mike and sang

_I met a gin soaked bar-room queen in Memphis_

_She tried to take me upstairs for a ride_

_She had to heave me right across her shoulder_

_'cos I just can't seem to drink you off my mind._

George joined him for the chorus as he also played an acoustic guitar

_You're a honky tonk woman_

_Gimme, gimme, gimme the honky tonk blues_

_You're a honky tonk woman_

_Gimme, gimme, gimme the honky tonk blues._

It was a fun song to play as I loved the Stones, they were popular in the Forces and nearly everyone knew at least one of their songs and could sing along. I especially liked _Paint it Black_ and _Sympathy for the Devil_ and encouraged the guys to sing these two as well. I joined in the singing and really found I was enjoying myself. George sang _Sympathy_ really well and I could imagine him as Old Nick "_Call me Lucifer_".

The audience seemed appreciative and I knew we had won them over. We played _Jumping Jack Flash_ as our encore before leaving the stage after the obligatory bows. I was feeling wired and ready for another beer. I gave Gerry his guitar and we took our table again and nearby patrons bought us a round to quench our thirsts.

* * *

That had been a lot of beer, I excused myself and went in search of the ladies room. After the sheer delight of relieving myself I was coming back along the darkened corridor and ran into the last person I wanted to see - Lucius Malfoy.

We stared at each other without saying anything for a good few minutes before he finally spoke in that memorable Malfoy voice "_You're still alive I see. I'd heard that you died in the Balkans_."

Where did people hear such bullshit and who was making up these stupid stories about me _"No Mister Malfoy, I'm very much alive. I'd heard you were in Azkaban_".

"_Yes Miss Granger I was, no thanks to your meddling friends and their filthy Ministry allies either_" Ok, he was the same old Malfoy. "_You should watch your back Missy_" were his parting words before he shouldered his way past me pushing me roughly into the wall.

No drawn wand, no death threats and a warning to take care. I'd have to discuss this behaviour with Severus when I saw him on Saturday. What was wrong with Lucius Malfoy, had the years really mellowed him or was he disillusioned with his psychotic Master. I'd remembered the days when meeting him in a dark place was an invitation to a killing. I was confused, to say the least, by his behaviour.

* * *

I was still looking in the direction Malfoy had gone when I felt a hand on my shoulder, turning I saw it was Gerry.

"_You ok hon_" he said as he looked deeply into my eyes. I smiled up at him and nodded, it seemed that was all the invitation he needed. His hands moved to my waist and he smiled before slowly lowering his mouth to mine.

He tasted like bourbon, cigars and perspiration, a potent combination. My hands drifted up his chest and came to rest on his shoulders before finally winding their way into his hair. I moved into his kiss and responded warmly, opening up to his questing tongue and enjoying the feeling of it caressing my own. With me backed against the wall he gently increased the pressure of the kiss and pushed his body against me. Heaven on a stick, this was so good I was melting into the darkness and loving his every movement against my more than willing body. His hand drifted up to my breast and carefully touched me through my T-shirt and bra, very nice.

The kiss deepened substantially without becoming rough. Gerry was really good at this and I suspected he'd had a lot of practice. I felt his hips moving against mine and I rocked forward from the wall to rub myself against his growing bulge, he moaned deeply and moved his mouth to my neck. His other hand came up and both were now engaged in fondling my beasts. It appeared that Gerry was a breast man, but as it was one of my favourite small pleasures I was really not going to complain.

I leant my head back, curving my back to offer better access to my neck. Gerry had managed to pull my T-shirt out of my jeans and his hands were now creeping under my bra. I was wearing the one I'd just bought today so was not in fear of scaring him off with my usual sports contraption that was aimed at reducing jiggle and minimising the bust. This new bra did the exact opposite, it offered all assets in the best possible light to the viewing public.

He was breathing heavily by the time he'd managed to get my shirt and bra raised far enough to lower his mouth to my nipple, he sucked at one while teasing the other and I gasped gripping his hair so hard that I was in fear of ripping it out at the roots. I was moaning audibly and looking forward to what might come next when we were both shocked out of our pleasure by a voice calling my name.

"_Hermione where the hell are you_" it was Fred with his wand out and a Lumos spell lighting the corridor.

Gerry jumped and pulled my T-shirt down so quickly that I'd doubted he had it up in the first place. If it wasn't for the tingling and wetness I felt in my lower regions I would have thought it was just a fantasy I was engaged in. Rearranging my errant breasts and tucking my T-shirt back in I kissed Gerry quickly before saying "_Here Fred, just coming_" well I hadn't. Damn it. Gerry patted me on the bottom softly before he slipped away.

I heard a barely audible "_later_" whispered.

* * *

"_What took you so long_" Fred asked looking at my messed hair in an inquiring way while grabbing my hand and leading me back into the main bar.

"_Um, line up at the ladies loo_" I know it sounded trite, but he seemed to buy it.

"_Sure, OK, they're going to judge the talent show now_" Fred said.

I sat down again between the twins, George putting his arm around my shoulder in a friendly way while Fred handed me another drink before patting my thigh. These guys had always been somewhat touchy feely.

The MC stood on the stage, the band's drummer did a roll "_And the people's choice winning song is… Jumping Jack Flash_" The band started to play their own version of the song as we leapt up in excitement, skipping up to the stage in a very _Dorothy, Lion and Tin Man_ sort of way.

After some small encouragement we sang the song together again with the accompaniment of the band, the applause was almost deafening. I'd gotten my spending money for the books I was going to hunt for tomorrow and the lads had a free meal when ever they fancied one. We bowed and left the stage, elated that we were indeed the Champions tonight.

* * *

It was late, close to 1 am, Fred and George had a business to run and we decided now was a good time to leave. As we rose from our table Gerry appeared and walked us to the street. I hugged the twins promising to drop in for a cuppa tomorrow and to help out now that Nadia was no longer working for them. They left and I was alone with Gerry again.

He turned to me and gently ran his fingers down the length of my face. "_I really want you to stay with me tonight but I have to tell you something._"

Here it comes I thought, I guessed that I was much more attractive an hour ago in the darkened corridor under the influence of grog.

"_I'm married, well, separated actually. My wife's a Muggle and she's back in New Orleans running our other bar. I don't know if we'll be getting back together or not, it's been 4 months now_" in his favour he at least looked genuinely sorry. "_I want to be with you, have you in my bed, but I don't know if that's what you want, whether it's fair on you_."

An honest man, at least he seemed honest in this light. My smile faded and my lips had become fixed flat, I cupped his face with my hand, leaning in for a kiss. The kiss was light, I wanted more, much more, but managed to pull back. "_You're right, thanks for telling me. Why don't we keep in touch and see how things go_." I dropped my hand from his face and stepped back.

Gerry took both of my hands in his own and squeezed "_Sure thing Sweet Missy, I look forward to seeing you again_" he reached up and took my tags in his hand giving them a rub as if they would bring him luck. One last lingering kiss, barely there, and he drifted back into the darkness of his bar.

* * *

I stood there for a moment and sighed. I sure could pick them. I didn't expect to see him again any time soon. Of course I knew that the road to true love for a 26 year old witch was not going to be easy, all the sexy wizards were either taken, liars or psychotic.

Suddenly I felt the need for the comforting hug of one Severus Snape. If only he was here to banish my demons. "_Severus, where are you_" I turned my face to the dark sky and cried out for my friend as my feet found their own way back to the Leaky Cauldron and my chaste bed.

* * *

Somewhere in Scotland a man tossed in his bed unable to sleep. Sitting up he imagined he had heard his sweetheart call his name, but the other side of the bed was tragically empty. Slipping out of bed he went to the bathroom to splash water on his tired, worn face. Reaching out he touched the bare surface of the mirror, only two days and she would be here. He missed Hermione, and Severus knew that he should make a move to win her heart before another man beat him to it. He didn't know how he would live with himself if that happened. 


	6. The Scarlet Letter

**Chapter 6**

**The Scarlet Letter **

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**Authors note:** Please be warned – there is some Ron bashing and domestic violence in this chapter. Hermione finally finds out the true nature of her ex-best friend.

The Scarlet Letter is by Nathaniel Hawthorn, I found it to be very enjoyable – though a tad too wordy. Perhaps you might enjoy the movie version instead.

* * *

**Friday morning.**

Damn my body clock – 6 am again. Even though I only got to bed at 1:30 I know that if it's 6 then it's time to get up. I suppose I can always have a nap before the Karaoke spectacular tonight.

I stumble into the bathroom and splash some water on my face, eyes are a bit bloodshot but that's nothing a few eye drops won't fix. Thankfully no hangover, I didn't mix drinks and feel quite alright. Time for a spot of exercise.

30 minutes later I've graduated from a brisk walk to a quick jog and I find myself at the local park. I'm not the only one apparently that can't sleep in this London dawn, there's a group doing some Tai-chi exercises and as I watch the leader nods at me to join in. I do. Tai chi is very relaxing and the body movements feel very organic and remind me of other places and people I have known. As the group finishes my Minnie watch (named after Minerva who gave it to me) tells me it's 7:15. I bow my thanks to the group and their leader tells me in broad Londoner accent that I'm welcome anytime 6:30 am 7 days.

I jog back to the Cauldron with my only thoughts firmly on a large mug of tea. I'm in the door and the morning maid greets me before I ascend the stairs with a worried look on her face.

* * *

"_What's wrong Janie_" I ask placing my hand on her shoulder, I have to lower my face to look into her shy down turned one "_Has something happened_?"

Young Janie is Tom's niece and she's normally very quiet_ "There's people waiting for you in your room Mistress_" she finally mumbles out.

I look at her and knit my brows. "_People_" I ask "_Who are they, do you know_?"

"_It's Missus Weazley Maam_"

"_What would Molly want at this time of the morning_" I'm thinking aloud.

"_No Maam_" she counters quickly "_It's the other Missus Weazley and I reckon she's in a bit of bother._"

I start to wonder how many Mrs. Wesley's there are in the Wizarding world and conjure my wand just to be on the safe side. It's best to arrive with a show of force especially if I don't know exactly what I'm up against.

Making my way up the stairs I hope my intruder hasn't ransacked the room and found my hand pistol.

I knock and stand back and aside from the door. No sound at first then a small shuffling and the door opens. It's Luna Lovegood's face that pokes out.

"_Luna_?"

"_Hermione_" she steps back and the door falls open. I walk in and she sits back on the edge of the bed. First thing I notice is 3 small children curled up asleep.

Luna's face is downcast and her shoulders are slumped. What could have happened, is Ron dead perhaps?

"_Luna, what's wrong_" I ask her gently as I kneel in front of her.

Her faces rises to meet my eyes, she looks like she's been in a fight. Her eye sports a good sized bruise and her lip is split and bruised as well. I notice that she's also heavily pregnant, maybe 7 or 8 months gone. I reach to touch her face and she tries to move her head so I can't see the marks.

"_Who did this to you?_"

Her response is barely a whisper as the tears start to roll down her tired face "_He did_"

He, who is he I wonder. "_He who_?"

"_My husband_" the words come out in a hiss like she is naming Voldemort "_Ron Weazley_."

I rock back on my heels and land in a heap on my bum with a thump "_Shit, Ron. Shit_" I don't know what to say. Ron can be a sulky bastard but I never imagined he would hit Luna like this.

"_When, how, why_?" I need to know. I sit cross-legged on the floor and listen.

Her story came out in blurts, interspersed with sobs. It seems that since the last baby was born, he's now 1 years old, things have been going down hill. Ron has been drinking and has been moved to the Reserve team for the Cannons (Quiddich team). He has complete control of all of Luna's assets and has sent her back to work at the Quibbler full-time which she has barely managed with the children in tow. Since he found out she was pregnant again he kicked her out of the house and they have been living in a room above the office of the newspaper. No matter how much money she earned he seemed to spend more than there was. When the eviction and notice of foreclosure on the paper's premises came to her 3 days ago she went to Ron and he beat her up.

Finally she told me "_We've been staying at the office until they came to lock us out today. I'd heard that you were here and I hoped that maybe you could sort Ron out for us_."

Sort him out – I'll kill the fucking bastard!

"_What are Molly and Arthur doing about this_?"

Her head bows again "_Ron told me to stay away from them, they think I'm filth and don't want to see me_."

I'm incensed, Molly would never… would she? "_Did Molly actually tell you this or did Ron say that_"

"_Ron_" just one softly spoken word.

"_Alright love, you stay here I'll get Tom to send up some breakfast. Try to get some sleep while I sort things out_" she looks at me sadly and I just hug her. Poor thing, I'd never imagined it would come to this.

I kiss her on the forehead then give her my wand for protection. "_Don't be afraid to use it if he comes OK?_" she nods.

I organise things with Tom, then apparate directly into the Kitchen of the Burrow.

"_Molly_" I call out loudly "_Arthur_,_ it's Hermione!_".

Molly appears "_Hermione Love, how are you_" it's the normal smiling Molly I've always known. Wiping her hands on her apron "_Are you Ok Hermione_?" she looks worried when she sees the look on my face.

"_Ron isn't here is he_" I look around - no, she shakes her head "_Can we sit and talk Molly, it's important_" yes she nods.

We sit at the kitchen table, a cup of tea in my hand.

I'm pleased to note that Molly is completely shocked, Arthur joins us. He's shocked too. They had no idea at all that Luna and the children were in dire circumstances. Ron had come to visit and brought a different child each time except the youngest one. He'd told them a variety of excuses over the last few months as to why Luna didn't come to visit. The excuses always had to do with work duties or family sickness. They didn't even know she was pregnant again.

Molly had finally come to the conclusion that maybe Luna simply didn't want to see them. Ron had agreed that was indeed the case and it was best not to push the issue. He was sure it was just a passing phase.

We discussed a battle campaign and grabbed a few essentials before apparating to the Leaky Cauldron.

* * *

Molly and Luna cry and hug each other. "_My baby girl_" Molly cries so much Luna may drown in her tears. The children are gathered and everyone goes downstairs to floo back to the burrow. I warn them to put up defensive barriers to prevent anyone from getting in or out of the house.

I change into business clothes, meaning boots, camos and a beret and go downstairs to where Arthur is waiting for me. A rather disheveled George has joined us leaving Fred to care for the store.

We try to apparate directly into Ron's house but there are wards up and we get catapulted back into the bar room at the Cauldron. No surprises there, however that would mean that his alarm should have gone off and he'd know someone was trying to get in. Next we hold hands and side apparate as close as we can to the property which is just outside Sussex.

It's a lovely house, a country manor – 2 stories with about 7 bedrooms. Our plan is to scout the perimeter eliminating any guards we can and then meet back at the hedge line to report before tackling the wards. Wands out for the men, and then we are off.

I head left and find a security guard with an Uzi. Grabbing him from behind I cut off his air supply just enough to knock him out. Taking the machine gun and his pistol I apparate with him to Brighton Pier, dump him, then apparate back. That should confuse him for a while.

George does the same to another large man with a dog. The dog seems to like George so he apparated him to the shop to find Fred. Fred likes dogs too and agrees to keep him. George then pops back and finishes his round.

Arthur doesn't have our luck and only finds a woman picking oranges from an orchard. She agrees to leave quietly to avoid trouble and apparates to her family home.

We meet back at the front hedge, discuss what we've found and then decide to send Arthur up to the front door. We use the gentle approach first just to see if Ron knows we're here.

* * *

The door opens, he's in. I have him fitted with a two way microphone transmitting wire and we can hear all the conversation. The maid tells Arthur that Mr. & Mrs. Weazley are upstairs in the bedroom. Would he care to wait. I hear a thump through the wire, "_She's down come inside_."

George and I run quietly to the main door, enter, and see the maid asleep in the hall chair. Arthur looks very pleased with himself as he twirls his wand. We fan out and check the downstairs for any other staff, all's quiet.

"_Who's this other Mrs. Weazley_" I whisper to the men, they both shake their heads and frown.

"_No idea_" says George. Arthur nods in agreement.

"_Must have another woman up there with him_" I say.

"_I'll kick his arse_" Arthur says in a low menacing way I've never heard him use before "_we didn't bring our boys up to be disrespectful_"

George and I both nod, we believe Arthur. The elder Weazley was a trained Ministry Auror before he moved into administration and he shouldn't be toyed with. I motion that I'll go first, we ascend the stairs.

* * *

Arthur motions to the master bedroom, we check it for wards and find none. I cast a quiet locking charm so who ever is inside can't get out. We fan out and check all the top floor rooms.

George finds 2 scantily clad women sleeping together in one of the rooms. We come to interrogate them and discover that they're groupies who've been living as kept women at the house for 6 months. They claim to not know anything. Apparently they are under the impression that Ron loves them, I sigh deeply at this admission. I hear a noise not unlike a kettle boiling and turn to Arthur - he has turned an interesting shade of puce and continues to clench and unclench his fists.

George and I take the women outside and we apperate with them to Knockturn Alley before dumping them unconscious in front of a brothel. We quickly apperate back to the house before Arthur gets the chance to kill Ron.

When we get back we find Arthur in a sitting room hugging a cushion, rocking and softly weeping. George stays to comfort him and I decide to tackle the errant Ron on my own. Ascending the stairs once more I drop the wards on the master bedroom and knock.

* * *

"_Ronnie, are you up_" I use my best girly voice.

I hear a voice from within inviting me in for a threesome. Who ever he thinks I am he sure as hell doesn't know squat.

George appears and we count to three before kicking the door in. The explosion creates screaming from the bed and when the dust settles I'm standing with a pistol pointed at Ron's head.

George grabs the naked girl and drags her out the door, I notice in passing that even in the Wizarding world she is probably jailbait. If nothing else sticks then statutory rape should.

"_Hello Ron_" I say sweetly "_Have you missed me honey_?"

At least he looks shocked, I see his hand reaching for the wand on his bedside table.

"_Accio Wand_" I say, and it flies into my hand. I promptly snap it in two before putting in into my side leg pocket. "_No need for wands Ron, lets talk_."

"_Is this about Luna_" he looks worried but tries to hide it "_listen she left me Mione, it's all lies, I didn't do anything._" He sits up in the bed, the sheet slides down to his lap - I notice he's naked and very white – I shudder.

He couldn't miss the look on my face, pure disgust "_Sweetie, you know I still love you, it's always been only you. Come here and let me show you how much I still want you._" what a fucking slime ball, he's patting the bed beside him and leering at me.

As he was still patting the bed Arthur steps out from behind me. He'd heard it all and without hesitating for a moment he goes straight over to the bed and punches Ron in the jaw. Ron manages a scream, high and girly, before Arthur grabs him and punches him again.

"_You piece of shit_" Arthur fumes as he draws back to hit him a third time. George runs in and restrains his father's arm. The bed is covered in Ron's blood as is Arthur's fist. Ron is mercifully unconscious by this stage.

* * *

Half an hour later under Auror escort we're at Azkaban prison in a trial room. The on-call Magistrate is hearing the matter, the rape and battery of one Luna Weazley by her husband Ronald; the statutory rape, multiple counts, of Simona Johanson, 14 years; the deprivation of sufficient funds to care for his three children; and the deliberate destruction of one business, namely the Quibbler Newspaper and press.

Our Ministry appointed lawyer is very good. She recommends immediate dissolution of the marriage; all marital funds and goods to be given to Luna Weazley; and Ron to be sentenced to prison for 18 months with a non-parole period of 12 months.

The Magistrate allowed the immediate marital dissolution on the grounds of cruelty and adultery and decided to hold Ron in custody until the rest of the charges could be heard by a higher court. All of Ron's money was allotted to Luna as was the property and sole custody of the children. A ministry official was appointed as Luna's case worker and would take her to Gringott's later to work out the legal settlement and discovery of property and monies.

Molly is holding Luna and they were both crying, the children are safe with Ginny at the Burrow. Harry, George and Fred stand looking at Ron in pity. Even Percy is here and he looks disgusted. Ron's head is bowed into his hands and he was crying.

Arthur and I are standing next to the Lawyer with stoic looks on our faces. We were angry and that anger went beyond sorrow so we shed no tears. We all watch as the guards take Ron away to the holding cell, only Luna and Molly continued to cry.

The Magistrate left and so did the family. Arthur kissed me on the forehead as he left trailing after Molly and Luna. George, Fred and Percy each shake my hand in turn. Only Harry and I are left standing in that cold unforgiving place.

* * *

Harry turned to me "_I should have known, I didn't see anything. I was blind_." A silent tear slipped down his cheek. "_Can you ever forgive me Hermione_!"

I look at him then, it had been 5 years since I'd last seen Harry. He was a man, strong and handsome yet so vulnerable, still a boy. "_It's not my forgiveness you should be seeking Harry. Sometimes we are all guilty of being blind_."

I offer him my hands and soon we're hugging each other in silence. It felt just like hugs of old in times of need. "_I love you Harry, I always will_" no tears, just our hugs in the aching silence.

We flooed back to the Leaky Cauldron together. I simply didn't feel like an outing with Lavender and Padma so I sent word that I couldn't make it tonight. I let it slip that I was spending the night with a man, not telling them who said man was. That at least would satisfy them and get me off the hook.


	7. That's What Friends are for

**Chapter 7**

**That's What Friends are for.**

**

* * *

**

**Authors note: **Aren't I terrible! Not only have I misspelt Weasley but I called them Wesley by mistake as well. Oops, sorry.

I don't hate Ron, but I seriously don't like him either. I did warn you all that he was going to get it, didn't I?

* * *

I sent my apologies to the girls, no Karaoke tonight.

"_Come upstairs Hermione and lets make you human again_"

"_Yes Harry_" I responded submissively following my old friend up the stairs.

"_Strip, shower, frock, dinner_" Harry counted off his fingers trying to sound officious.

I plopped down on the bed and stared at my boots. The unlacing seemed to evade me at present. I felt suddenly overwhelmed by the simplest of tasks and emotionally drained.

Harry stood just inside the door and looked at me sadly. It was quite obvious to him that I wasn't capable of attempting the tasks he had set.

He sighed deeply then came over and knelt in front of me. Unlacing the boots he lifted my legs one at a time and dragged the boots off. Socks next. I continued to sit like a Zombie.

Helping me to my feet he undid my buttons taking off my shirt then lifting my arms off came the T-shirt. Next he undid my belt, then dropped my trousers and knickers, and finally off came the bra. I was naked before my friend and he acted like a nurse in a hospital, I was merely a patient that needed care. He looked at my face and shook his head.

Taking my hand he led me to the bathroom. He took off his own shirt, shoes and socks I sat on the closed toilet seat mutely observing him. He turned on the shower and adjusted the water temperature.

A quick wave of his wand transformed his trousers into swimming trunks and he took my hands leading me into the cubicle with him. I stood under the stream of water as he shampooed my hair then scrubbed my back. 10 minutes later I felt cleaner than I had in many years.

We stood under the warm water as he held me in his arms, just held me and kissed my wet hair.

"_It's going to be Ok Love, Ron's going to need a bit of therapy and hopefully it'll knock some sense into him_" Harry reassured me.

I held onto him "_Is it my fault, leaving him, did it drive him to this Harry_?"

"_I just don't know Love, he spoke about you heaps in the first couple of years, sometimes he was angry, but then he became detached and full of bravado. The drinking didn't help, but he always claimed it was just social. Maybe this would have happened any way_." Harry sighed as he finished.

He turned off the water and cast a drying spell to finish. I felt much better. Wrapping me in a towel he led me to the bedroom and sat me down on the bed. Flicking his wand to replace his clothes he sat down next to me and took my hand in his.

I turned to him then and said "_We were lovers, I was in love with Ron for so many years. That last year at school we dated and it was nice for a while. He was never violent with me. We fighted of course, shouted and stomped, but he never hit me. Not once. I remember him saying that it wasn't the Weasley way, hitting women was wrong. What changed Harry, is it a curse, drugs what?_"

"_I know that he uses the Wizard version of cocaine. I've seen him do it. Pretty powerful stuff to_" Harry stopped to rub his chin and looked back at me with despair written all over his face.

"_It was the power and the fame, Ron's pretty fucked up at the moment I just hope we can help to dry him out and get him back to normal_"

"_And what about Luna and the kids_" I asked.

"_She loved him once, but I just don't know if she'll ever forgive him_."

"_Harry_" I said.

"_Mm, yup_"

"_The whole vigilante thing is getting to me. The Wizard world just isn't like the Muggle world. I mean, Luna could have gone to the police, or family services might have intervened. I had to drag Arthur and George over there and take Ron down because there was no other option. It was terrible_" my head drooped and although I wasn't crying I felt terrible as if I'd let Ron down and betrayed our love. "_Poor Arthur_" I shook my head at the thought and the blood on his hands.

"_Yeah, like the family services rescued me from The Dursley's you mean_" he chuckled dryly "_All the world has problems, that's why we fight Voldemort, you fight the bad guys, life is a struggle. One day when Ron is dried out he'll forgive you Love and maybe thank you. _"

Harry stood up abruptly and bowed to me "_I suggest we get you prettied up and then we eat_".

"_What's hiding in your closets then_" he whipped a door open with a flourish.

"_White dress uniform, no. Patent shoes, no. Boat shoes, no. Hmm_" he continued to dig and express his disapproval.

Closing the first side he looked at me with a scowl before turning to open the next "_Ah ha, that's more like it, pretty frocks_!" He'd finally found my new dresses.

He also found my new lingerie. Holding up the small frillies he nodded "_Pretty, pretty, just what you need_" and tossed them onto the bed.

He then held up each dress in front of me before choosing the deep blue crushed velvet and a pair of matching low-heeled sequined shoes. He found the stay up fish nets as well and looked them over before putting them in front of his own trouser legs "_Not today_" He shook his head, bringing a smile and small chuckle from me.

"_Signs of life, Beam Me Up Scotty_" he started to do a strange animated jig like he was eager to be beamed up to the Starship Enterprise. "_I canno' hold her Captain, she's breaking up_" by now I was laughing at his antics and Harry was having trouble staying in character.

I pointed at his clothes and transfigured them into an exact replica of Captain Kirks uniform.

"_Stop it Pinky or I shall have to hurt you_" I tried my Brain accent on for size (Pinky and the Brain – one of them's a genius, the other one's insane).

"_Alright you, get dressed_" Harry demanded with a very Kirk like stance, hands on hips feet wide apart "_Make is so Number One_." He'd lost his line of Trekking and flipped to Jean-Luc speak.

I stood, saluted then turned to the bed dropping my towel and dressing. Harry's didn't watch me, he gave me my privacy by walking to the window and looking out towards the sky. I looked at his back and thought that friends like him are indeed hard to find.

"_Ok done_" I twirled in a flourish to show off my new dress.

Harry turned to me and smiled as his clothes changed back from the Star Trek uniform to his black robes "_That's my girl, you're beautiful Hermione_" he nodded his head "_really very lovely_."

He came over to me and kissed me on the cheek before taking me in a warm hug "_I'll always love you too, you know_."

"_Thank you Harry_."

* * *

It was 6:30 PM and we decided to go to Harry's house in Grimauld Place. I'd promised to make my favourite pasta recipe for him. We flooed in to the kitchen with a bag of groceries. The kitchen felt quiet and strange without Molly bustling around in it. I told Harry so, he smiled and nodded.

"_It's been a while actually, usually just me, Remus and Tonks. Sometimes Hagrid or Severus and the other Order people, but it's not the same without Dumbledore_" he rubbed his hand over the scrubbed oak of the table surface in a caress and his face looked wistful.

"_You'll be surprised to know that we finally got rid of the portraits. Donated them all to the Wizard Art Gallery. Silly bastards, fancy taking on Old Mrs. Black_" he laughed setting me off too.

"_No way, that's a riot. Bet the old bag screamed blue murder_"

"_Yep, sure did. It was Dobby, he came up with an Elfish spell that worked wonders_"

"_How is Dobby by the way, still enjoying his freedom_?"

We chatted about Dobby, Harry's job and his love life.

"_Well I wanted to marry Ginny, you know. But she's a bit too kinky for my liking. She doesn't want to be exclusive and I just can't do the whole sex orgy scene that she fancies_"

"_No way_" I laughed.

"_Yes way_" he saw my look of surprise and laughed back. "_She showed up here with a group of people and wanted me to perform for them all. The Famous Harry Potter sex romp! Can you imagine what Rita Skeeter would write_" he screwed his face up in horror.

"_It just wasn't worth my job to be caught inflagrante like that. I mean, come on, I'm an Auror, I work part-time at Hogwarts helping out Remus and Minerva when they need it. You can't work with children if people think you're a sex fiend. Well, it just wasn't my thing either_" finally he sat down at the table and leaned his chin onto his hands watching me chop ingredients.

"_Know what I mean Herms_"

I nodded, yes I knew. We chatted about general stuff until an Owl tapped at the window.

'_Can you come to the Burrow for a few hours, need your support please. Love Molly_.'

Harry handed the note to me. "_Wanna come to the Burrow_" he asked.

I shook my head "_No, I don't think so. I'll stay here, cook and wander around if that's ok with you._"

He ran from the room before I could say anything else, why the hurry I thought. A few minutes later he came back with an old guitar "_This belonged to Sirius, give it a tune and it'll help you relax_".

I looked a the well-worn instrument, smiled and kissed him on the cheek. He saluted me before flooing away leaving me alone in the quiet tomb that was Grimauld Place.

* * *

A few hours later I'd cooked a pot of Puttanesca sauce and was drying some home made fettuccine pasta. I love making my own pasta, it always tastes better than the dried packet stuff and the kneading was therapeutic. I hummed to myself disjointed snippets from _The Barber of Seville_.

Moving into the lounge room I transfigured tuning pipes from a plectrum and started on the guitar. For it's age it didn't sound too bad and I started to play some chords. I didn't know what to play, thinking what would Sirius play – _Stairway to Heaven_! I smiled to the memory of Sirius Black, he was truly a mad bastard of the highest order.

The clock chimed 10 and I started to feel tired. I put the guitar aside and curled up on the couch for a quick nap.

* * *

More chimes, I open my eyes and hear voices. Casting a dillusionment charm on myself I stayed very still and listened.

"_Why don't' you just tell her_" voice 1 asked.

"_I'm a chicken Ok, she'll just laugh at me_" voice 2

"_Huh, no she won't. I bet she'll be in your arms in a minute_" voice 1

"_Are you stupid Wolf, she'll run a bloody mile I'm telling you_" voice 2

Wolf, Ok I thought, must be Remus.

"_Don't be stupid Sev, if you love her you've got to tell her before someone else steals her away from you_" voice 1

Sev, Severus Snape. He and Remus are old friends.

Both men sounded tipsy. I wondered who the She was that Severus couldn't tell.

"_Just say, listen here woman – you and me, Ok_" Remus laughed out loud.

"_Aint you just the last of the romantics, I bet she'd love that suave approach_" Severus laughed as well.

They stepped into the kitchen. In the light I saw that it was definitely Remus and Severus, both lurching slightly with mild intoxication.

Severus went to the stove and lifted the lid on the pot "_Hmm, Puttanesca_" he said sniffing the sauce "_Harry cook this for you_?"

Remus thought for a minute through his alcohol induced fog "_Harry's a shit cook, does it look and smell like shit_?"

Digging in the drawer for a spoon Severus lifted the lid again and tasted the sauce_ "Mmm, no it's lovely. Maybe Molly dropped it over_?"

"_Look, fresh pasta too. I'm hungry_" Severus whined in a little boy voice.

"_Harry. HARRY_" Remus shouted "_You here_?".

No reply. "_No Harry_" Remus said shrugging his shoulders.

Under the charm I sneaked into the kitchen to watch them, intending to scare a years growth out of them both.

"_You know she wrote me, she'll be coming __to the ball__ tomorrow night_" Severus' eyes were downcast and he sighed before looking up at his friend and smiling tightly. He took a photo out of his jacket pocket and handed it to Remus.

I sneaked around to look, it was the recent one of me in my desert gear. I couldn't stop my smile, he fancied me, he carried my photo around!

Remus sighed as well "_She's beautiful. Maybe you're right Sev, an ugly old bastard like you - she'll run away alright_."

Severus snatched back the photo and snarled at his friend "_Not helping Wolf_." He kissed the photo lightly before putting it away again.

"_Don't you love a woman in uniform though_" Remus smiled and giggled slightly. "_I bet she knows lots of weird bedroom shit._"

Severus punched him in the arm "_Oi, that's the love of my life you're talking about. Be respectful_."

* * *

I sneaked back into the lounge room and wondered what to do next. Surprise attack might work. I moved noiselessly up the stairs and started to make a racket as I stomped back down again to the kitchen whistling.

Both men ducked "_What the fuck…"_ Remus scuttled around to the back of the table beside his hiding friend.

I walked into the kitchen and went to the stove to heat the sauce.

I hear the sound of the men shuffling around to the other side of the table.

"_Who's there, show yourself_" I say aloud extending my wand at the source of the sound.

A voice from under the table "_It's me – Remus_" he stood up.

"_And Severus_" he stood up as well. Both men looked pretty sheepish and held up their hands in mock surrender.

"_Remus, Severus_" I said with no hint of surprise to my voice "_fancy some pasta_."

Both men nod enthusiastically.

10 minutes later we are all seated at the table with Severus grating fresh Parmesan cheese. We ate with relish, it's really very good pasta.

"_Would I sound pompous if I said I love my own cooking_" I say through a mouthful of pasta.

"_If all your cooking is this good then maybe you can adopt us both_. _Can I call you Mum_" Remus laughed between bites of his meal "_this fresh pasta is superb Hermione_"

"_House Elf cooking does get pretty predictable after a few years doesn't it_" Severus stated "_It's so nice to have a friend that knows how to cook."_

I sigh and reach out my hands to touch them both "_My boys, of course I'll adopt you both. You can become Army brats and follow me around and annoy all the other children on base._" Remus laughs, but Severus looks dreamily at me as he sucks up a length of fettuccine.

There's some sauce on his chin and I lean over to lift it off with my index finger. I put the finger into my mouth and suck on it. Remus averts his eyes somewhat embarrassed but Severus just stares at my mouth, he swallows and clicks out of the moment returning to his meal.

Remus finally clears his throat "_So how's work Herms?_"

"_Well last month I strangled a man with my bare hands_" I say matter of factly "_A group of men tried to stone me to death last week and my Lieutenant stepped on a land mine_."

"_Pretty normal then_" Severus counters.

"_Yep_" I say.

We both turn to Remus and see his shocked expression and I laugh. "_It's war Remus, how much fun can I have in a battle zone. Get serious!_"

Poor Remus, he looks like he could curl up and die. I reach over and pat his shoulder and smile, he relaxes under my touch.

The fireplace blazes Green, Harry's home at last.

"_Remus, Severus_" he smiles "_How are you guys doing_?" he shakes hands then heads for the stove "_Any left_?"

Remus then "_It was too good to keep some for you, have some dessert instead._"

Harry sits with us and spoons out some trifle "_Did Herms tell you about Ron_?"

* * *

I stand and kiss Harry on his unruly hair before leaving the room, I don't want to hear any more about Ron. I'm starting to feel very guilty for acting like a vigilante and wish I could feel a little justified. In the lounge I slip down on the sofa tucking my legs under my chin.

Only a few minutes pass before Severus sits down on the other end of the sofa. He takes my feet into his lap and starts to rub them.

"_You have lovely feet_"

"_Thank Lavender Brown she gave me a pedicure yesterday_"

"_Hmm_" he murmurs putting just the right amount of pressure onto my toes.

We sit quietly for a few moments enjoying the silence together.

"_We were in love but only ever made love once_" I began "_all those years we were friends at school, it was so love hate. In the last year we tried to go one step further but it just didn't work for me. When I decided to leave for the Academy and I though Ron would just move on as well. He had his Quiddich and the fame he always wanted, I thought he'd forget me_."

Severus raised his head from my feet to look me in the face "_I'm listening_"

"_He sent me letters begging me to come back that first year, then they turned a little bit nasty. It was really strange, the letters were snippy and cruel. Did you know I even went out with Charlie a couple of times hoping that Ron would notice that I wasn't interested in him. I guess Charlie wasn't the one either_."

The massage moved to my ankles and I wiggled my feet with pleasure.

"_Then there was the last letter telling me that he and Luna were going to be married. That was all it said, nothing else. I was happy for them and Molly invited me to the wedding. I'd hoped that they'd have a good life together. Luna is strange but rather sweet_."

"_You weren't to know this would happen_." He held my feet and looked straight into my face "_Lots of relationships fail, Luna and the children will be safe now and Weasley will dry out and face his tormentors_."

"_I hope so Severus, I just wish it could have been resolved some other way. Poor Arthur, he was shattered. His face was broken with grief. I feel so responsible_."

"_Too many Schwarzenegger movies eh_?" he mused.

"_Yes I 'spose so_" I smiled as he released my feet.

He rose from the sofa and stretched. "_I need some sleep, you_?"

"_Yeah, I should be going, let you boys do whatever you three do here without women about_" I laugh and take his offer of the hand up. "_I'll see you tomorrow night then_?"

* * *

"_Stay_" he hadn't released my hands "_Come up and sleep with me Hermione_." He smiled a small smile, kind and loving. I felt my heart skip a beat.

"_Are you going to have kinky Slytherin sex with me Severus Snape_?" I asked in my most coy voice.

"_Um_" he looked down at his feet then up at the ceiling, his tongue inching out to lick his lips. He finally returned to look at my mouth avoiding my eyes "_I hadn't planned on it, I thought I'd wait until you were asleep first and then you'd think it was an Incubus_." He was blushing, I couldn't believe Snape, the most feared man in Hogwarts, was actually blushing.

"_Take me to bed Severus_" I nodded my head then bent down to pick up my shoes "_I'm really tired and I'd love your company tonight_."

* * *

We didn't say anything else until we were safely inside his room. I used the bathroom and then came out and found Severus sitting on the bed slipping off his boots and socks. Sitting next to him I helped him undo the buttons on his coat and vest.

Soon he was stripped down to his trousers and I turned to hang up his shirt, vest and coat in the cupboard giving him some space to remove his trousers. When I turned he was standing closely behind me and handed me his trousers and I hung them up as well.

I didn't know what to expect from Severus Snape. The couple of times we'd kissed it had been me who initiated the intimacy, he'd never actually taken hold of me and kissed me first. I wondered if the time had come. He simply stood close to me and watched my face.

I stepped back and raised my hands up into the air to encourage him to slip my dress up and over my head. It took him a moment to catch onto my silent request and then he obliged me. I didn't give him the time to look at my new frilly knicker set and turned straight away to hang up my dress instead. When I turned back he was gone.

"_Sev_" I asked questioningly "_Where are you_?"

The shower sounded, the coward had run away to the shower. I slipped off my smalls and transfigured the bra into a knee length purple silk nightgown tossing it onto the bed. Slipping into the bathroom silently I found the loofa. Soaping it up I stepped into the shower.

He squealed at my cold hands, I laughed. "_Don't be so shy, I won't bite you_!" I held up the loofa and motioned for him to turn around so I could wash his back.

It didn't take long for him to relax under my ministrations as he leant against the wall and sighed. "_Mmm, that's nice don't stop_."

"_I'll have to stop before I flail you_" I whispered as I washed the soap off his back and then turned him around gently to scrub his chest. He surrendered to me and handed over the soap before leaning back and closing his eyes. I soon had him squeaky clean and kissed him softly on the chest before stepping out and drying myself leaving him to finish.

Going back into the bedroom I slipped on my nightgown and hopped into the bed plumping up my pillow and waited for Severus to come to bed. "_Nox_" I pointed at the overhead light and softly "_Lumos_" at the candle on the bedside table. I was so tired I closed my eyes and was soon fast asleep.

* * *

**Saturday Morning, 6 am.**

I woke to the first rays of the sun drifting in the window and stretched feeling totally relaxed. A low murmur reminded me that I wasn't alone. An arm was draped over my middle and I turned slowly so as not to disturb my bedfellow.

Severus Snape looked cute whilst asleep. He was lying on his stomach with his face turned towards me. I reached out and lifted the hair lying over his face and smoothed it back so I could watch him. Too cute indeed. Unfortunately nature called so I slipped out of bed and went to the bathroom trying not to wake my sleeping beauty.

By the time I'd gotten back to the bed he'd moved onto the other side and was cuddling my discarded pillow mumbling something that sounded somewhat like a potions checklist. I slipped back into the bed and wrapped my arms around him drawing myself into his back and enjoying the warmth of another human. His gentle sigh and backward lean told me that he was comfortable in my arms.

"_Sev_"

"_Mmm_"

"_You awake_" I raked my fingers up and down his chest.

"_Mmm_"

I took that as a yes and became entranced by the freckles on his back, kissing them as I wound my fingers in his chest hair. Soon he entwined his fingers with mine and was slowly kissing my hands making small sucking noises.

After a few minutes he rolled onto his back and drew me up so I was half covering him. He ran his hands into my hair and pulled my face down and started to slowly kiss my lips. At that moment I felt revered, his gentleness was entrancing and as his hands started their trek down my back I knew what it felt like to be truly loved.

We shifted onto our sides and he deepened the kiss degree by degree moving his tongue in a gentle rhythm against my own as he pushed my nightgown up running his hands slowly over my body . He stopped the kiss as he moved to lift the gown up over my head and looked into my eyes almost begging me to accept him. I smiled and kissed him lifting my hand to rub at his nipple rolling it between my thumb and forefinger, eliciting a deep moan that seemed to come from his very centre.

We continued to kiss and stroke each other, his hands finally starting their movement down my body. His mouth left mine and started on my neck before going to my breasts leaving a small trail of love bites in its wake. My breasts, his lips and mouth, biting, sucking and kissing. I arched my back and moaned winding my hands into his hair and holding him close.

"_Sev, yes, love_" I moaned incoherently "_more yes_."

I think I heard him chuckle slightly enjoying my passion and taking some small amusement in his ability to muddle my mind. I decided to take back some control.

I wrapped my legs tightly around his waist and rolled him onto his back coming up to straddle him.

Severus laughed at me, a deep manly chuckle.

"_What_?" I said.

He continued to laugh and started to tickle me, I broke into a fit of laughter too. I'm afraid the mood was broken and we both started to giggle like a pair of teenagers. The blankets and sheets were on the floor and there I was naked straddling Severus Snape and we were both in hysterics tickling each other.

* * *

The door burst open and there stood Remus with his wand out and Harry grappling to put his glasses on straight. Everyone was shocked into silence until I started to laugh again and grabbed the sheet and covered us up. Severus wrestled me down onto the bed and blew a raspberry on my stomach.

"_Stop, stop_!" I squealed and tickled him in the armpits. He jumped and rolled off the bed onto the floor.

I think Remus and Harry were in shock, they were both frozen in place with their mouths hanging open. I jumped up and tucked the sheet around my body and launched myself at Remus tackling him to the floor and tickling him too.

Harry backed out the door "_I'll make the coffee then eh_?" he ran down the stairs possibly fearing a group sexual encounter.

Remus managed to wriggle out of my grip and crawled out the door too closing it after himself. I lay face down on the floor gasping for breath as Severus moved up on top of me and collapsed in a heap kissing whatever bare flesh he could find.

"_Why are you so easy to love_" I asked him.

"_Slytherin charm my dear_" he replied between kisses.

I laughed and managed to wriggle enough to turn over so we were facing each other. He was now lying on top of me between my legs. I placed my hands on either side of his face and made eye contact giving him a serious face for a moment.

"_The Major called me in for a chat after the debriefing session_" I began.

He knitted his brow "_Why, what's up_"

"_My Commander recommended that I go back to University and study Law so I can work in a diplomatic mission_."

"_How do you feel about that_" he rolled onto his side and wrapped a leg around me to hold me in place.

"_It means that I'll be at Cambridge for 3 years with breaks either at training camp or on leave. It also means a promotion I could make Major if I'm good enough._"

"_No more combat then, will you miss it_"

I sighed and leant my forehead onto his chest "_I've seen so much shit Sev, I think it's sending me off. I don't want to spend my life strangling and shooting people_."

He kissed the top of my head "_I completely understand. Though you've done a lot of good too you know, the people you've saved_"

"_Mm_" I sighed "_If I take the offer I can have a home, maybe a family, husband and kids._"

"_Oh_" he murmured suddenly serious "_I didn't know you wanted kids_" at this he leant back and looked into my face "_with a Wizard or a Muggle_"

"_Wizard_"

"_Anyone in particular_"

"_Yes_"

"_Anyone I know_"

"_Yes_"

"_Who_" by this time he was starting to look a bit pissed off and had raised himself up to a sitting position giving me the most menacing jealous Snape glare he could manage whilst still sitting naked on the floor.

I grabbed him and kissed him on the mouth forcing him to respond with my persistent tongue.

He broke off the kiss "_That's not an answer Hermione_"

"_That's because you haven't asked the right question yet Severus_" I glared back at him.

At that he turned his back on me "_Damn it woman, why the hell are you here with me if there's someone else._" His head bowed and I thought that he might be crying.

'_How stupid are Slytherin men'_, I thought. Surely he knew that it was him. I sat up and crawled over kneeling behind him and putting my arms around his shoulders.

"_You Sir, are a goose!_"

He continued to shun me with his back so I snuggled my body against his and put my chin on the top of his head.

"_How could I possibly have had the time to form a relationship with anyone Severus. You, Hagrid and Harry are the only men I write to, can't you put two and two together and come up with an answer that doesn't have me shagging the whole Cannons team_?"

At this missive he seemed to relax a bit and melted back into my embrace.

"_There's a very good reason why I spent the night in your bed and not with Hagrid or Harry. It's you, you silly goose. Only you that I want."_

"_Me_?" he turned his head "_I'm your Wizard_?"

"_Try not to act so surprised Professor Snape, I bet you have offers like this every week. You're such a chick magnet_." I laughed at the shocked expression on his face.

He turned bodily to face me, and then raised himself up to kneel on the floor. Picking up the sheet he draped it around both of us and rose up offering me his hands before leading me to the bed where we sat on the edge. It was a strange moment, he just looked at me then raised his hand to touch my face like it was for the first time. He appeared to savour my skin and the feel of my hair, turning his head on the side to see me in a different light.

Raising my hands up he looked at them carefully seeming to inspect each finger. It took me by total surprise when he slipped off his pinky ring and slid it onto my left ring finger.

"_Be mine forever_" he whispered. A single tear formed at the corner of his eye with the emotion of those three words.

I looked at the ring, I'd never noticed that he wore a ring before. Perhaps he took it off when he worked in his lab. It was rose gold with a flat crest engraved with a snake encircling a wand. Quite beautiful, subtle and also very Snape. How could I resist.

"_Always_" I replied and leant in to kiss him firmly on the lips.

I slipped off my military crest ring from my right hand and offered it to him, slipping it onto his left pinkie.

"_Yes_" he said as he brought my hand up to kiss the palm.

A knock at the door broke our moment. It was Harry "_Sev, Mione come down for some breakfast_"

"_Ok Harry_" I replied "_10 minutes_" I heard him scoff at my 10 minute promise.

"_Yeah right_" his footsteps echoed away down the stairs.

"_Did you mean it, will you be my Wizard_" I asked Severus touching his cheek with my left hand now sporting his crest.

"_Yes_" he smiled "_if you'll have me._"


	8. Love Actually

**Chapter 8**

**Love Actually**

**

* * *

**

We eventually made it down to breakfast. Luckily Remus and Harry had gotten over their initial shock of seeing both Severus and I butt naked and rolling on the floor upstairs. I apologised for traumatising them both and delighted them with the news of our betrothal.

After a short discussion as to how long our engagement should be, and much male back slapping, Harry sent an Owl off to the Ministry to find out what times were available at the Ministry Chapel. I couldn't believe it, I was going to get married and Severus Snape was unable to wipe the grin off his face. I warned him that if the wind changed his face would stay that way but he was adamant that he couldn't give a damn.

Hedwig came back in half an hour with the news that there was a 2 p.m. cancellation and we had been pencilled in for that time. I squealed and flooed straight to the Leaky Cauldron to gather my possessions, pay my bill and ask a few people to come to the Ministry for the afternoon leaving off the news as to why I wanted them there. It was going to be a big surprise.

* * *

1:30 p.m. found me standing nervously in the foyer of the Ministry of Magic. I was wearing my white dress uniform, highly polished black shoes and gold braids. Whilst I waited I noticed quite a few people checking me out and I suspect they wondered why the hell I was here.

Minerva, Molly, Ginny, Tonks, Pomona Sprout and Rolanda Hooch all arrived at the same time looking just as nervous as I felt. They didn't have a clue as to why I'd called them here but Molly and Ginny both burst into tears when they saw me and enveloped me in a crushing hug. I managed to look over Molly's shoulder at Minerva and held up my ring hand to show her and then she also burst into tears and with the other ladies joined in the melee. The people in the foyer who hadn't noticed me yet now drew their attention to the gaggle of squealing witches in the corner. We all hurried off to the café to have a glass of wine so I could explain.

* * *

"_And then he asked me and I said yes_" I finished my diatribe.

Everyone let out a collective sigh and asked again who the lucky groom was.

"_It's a surprise but you all know him_" I giggled.

"_Hang on_" said Rolanda grabbing my left hand "_I recognise that crest_."

"_Shhhh_" was all I managed to get out as her eyes grew wide and she screamed.

"_Oh my Goddess, you haven't – You wouldn't_!" she sat back and burst into fits of laughter eventually shoving her fist into her mouth to stop the noise "_I need another drink_" she mumbled and promptly rushed up to the bar. Pomona and Tonks jumped up and raced after her and soon all three witches were squealing and jumping up and down hugging each other.

Minerva looked at me suspiciously "_You're not marrying Voldemort are you_?" she asked.

Molly choked on her drink and Ginny patted her on the back. I simply laughed "_Wait and see_" as I tucked my hand in my pocket to hide the ring.

* * *

At exactly 2 p.m. we had all fortified ourselves with alcohol and made our way to the Registry Chapel. Severus, Harry, Remus, Filus Flitwick and Arthur were waiting and they escorted us inside.

I took a deep breath and shook my hands in front of myself to scare away the jitters. Music started to play, _Vivaldi's Four Seasons_, the Spring movement. Severus and I stood in front of the altar together holding hands.

Hagrid stood before us and crossed his hands over his heart in a gesture of piety.

Suddenly Minerva came forward and broke our hold. I was surprised as she pushed me behind her back shielding me from Severus as if he had become a demon. She drew her wand and flicked it in a wide arc directly in front of Severus' face transforming it into Godric Gryffindor's sword.

"_Stand back you Snake_" she cried in outrage her face contorting in fury.

Severus looked totally stunned and was at a loss for words, he stumbled back two steps in horror. Filius then stepped in front of him to shield him from Minerva's wrath. As tiny as the Professor was he stood his ground and drew his wand too swinging it in an arc transforming it into a stave with a Snakes head.

"_And to you Lionness, prove your worth_" he returned her challenge banging his stave on the floor.

I looked up at Hagrid hoping he would do something but he just stood serenely and observed the combatants quietly. I swung myself around to the other guests but they too simply stood in a semi circle around us holding hands watching.

"_You've come here to try to take this maiden to your lair, what proof do you have that you can care for her_?" Minerva sneered.

Filius retorted "_We are strong and we have a castle for the maiden to reside in. What proof do you have that the girl will be faithful_?"

"_We are no longer a child full of fancy. Our wild seeds have already been sown and now as a woman we seek a mate for life_."

I hoped in all honesty that this was part of the ritual. The thought of Minerva killing Filius over my honour was more than a little disturbing.

They continued to parry, circle and threaten each other demanding to know in what ways we would live and love each other. It was quite touching to hear Minerva and Filius sing our praises. This must be the Wizarding version of the Best Man and Maid of Honour speeches I surmised. I smiled and looked to Severus who returned my smile now that he was also more at ease.

The two then suddenly ran at each other and clashed their weapons in a loud explosion of white light that bathed us all in a luminous aura. I noticed Molly close her eyes in anticipation of the event and I followed suit allowing the rush of warmth to wash over me then slowly disappear again. When I opened my eyes I saw Minerva and Filius embrace before they took our hands and joined them in a crosshatch. Minerva conjured a golden cord and she and Filius tied our hands together before joining the semi circle of our friends again.

* * *

Severus let out a deeply held breath and looked into my eyes, it helped me to relax as well when I saw his relief to have survived the ordeal.

Hagrid then uncrossed his hands and lay them open showing us his palms in a gesture of peace.

_Firstly I'd like to thank Minerva and Filius for their display of courage today. _He began..._  
_

_Welcome to the Wedding of Hermione and Severus_

_They have chosen to partake of traditional vows on this day_

_Vows that should not be taken by any person lightly _

_And I am pleased to have been called by Severus to join them in this way._

I squeezed Severus' hand and mouthed '_thank you'_ to him. He smiled back at me and squeezed as a response.

_As the Goddess loveth the Green Man_

_As winter shall surely return to spring_

_Man is not complete until he has loved a Woman_

_Nor shall a Woman take on the Aspect of the Goddess_

_Until she has taken unto her bed a Man._

_Love is never easy and it can be as fickle as the change of seasons_

_That is something we learn to live with together_

_And with love so shall Hermione and Severus learn these lessons too._

_We bind thee Hermione Jane Granger and Severus Salazaar Snape._

Hagrid then produced a small sharp knife with a pearl handle.

_Your blood shall join and you will become as one, your magic will meld and your love shall glow._

He made a small cut in my left palm and also in Severus' left palm then tightened the bindings so that our blood mingled together.

_Come forward those that have joined in this rite in their own times and bless this couple giving them strength._

Minerva, Molly, Arthur and Filius came forward. They each placed their left hands upon our binding.

_Severus, will you love Hermione until the Green Man calls you home?_

"I will"

_Hermione, will you love Severus until the Goddess lays you in eternal rest?_

"I will"

_As it is above, so shall it be below._

_Please everyone repeat after me_

_With Joy and with Love, So mote it be._

Everyone then repeated "_So mote it be_".

_Let no man, woman or beast create a vortex of chaos between those whom we have magically joined here today._

_I wish you both love and happiness. You may now share a kiss to seal the binding spell._

Hagrid wiped a tear from his eye, and as we kissed the bindings disappeared in a flash of gold light that briefly bathed us both in a shining aura. As the others stepped back from us Hagrid enveloped us in a fierce hug crushing us together.

"_I'm just so happy,"_ he cried out. Minerva took his arm and saved us from asphyxiation. Everyone cheered and clapped as they came up to congratulate us.

"_I just can't believe it_" Minerva cried as she hugged us.

"_Nor I_" cried the Professors in unison.

Everyone took their turn to hug us and I thanked them all for coming at such short notice.

"_The ball tonight will be a fitting reception for you both, a marriage on the All Hallows Eve is truly blessed_" Filius beamed at us.

* * *

We all posed for Colin Creevey as he took the wedding photos. Although Colin was a top freelance photographer he owed Harry a debt and took the pictures for free. I also suspected that the wedding of the most dreaded Potions Master of Hogwarts would make a great story for him to sell to Witch Weekly and this opportunity was just too good to pass up.

I hugged and kissed Hagrid before he left and thanked him for his lovely words. He blushed and said it was fitting that someone who loved both of us should join us in marriage. I couldn't help but adore the gentle giant.

As Severus hugged me and kissed me for a picture I still couldn't believe I was a married woman. Not only that but I was married to Severus Salazaar Snape. I hadn't known his middle name was Salazaar, I found that revelation rather creepy. Would we spend our wedding night in the Chamber of Secrets, or perhaps hanging from the dungeon ceiling by our feet? Merlin only knew.

* * *

The Professors all had to return to Hogwarts to finish the preparations for tonight's ball but the rest of us went nearby to a Sushi bar that Severus had found earlier. He quipped that it was Sushi that brought us together, but I think Arthur Weasley was just too excited at the prospect of eating with chopsticks at a Muggle restaurant to wonder at the nuances of the gesture from my new husband.

Remus and Tonks both held my hands as we walked to the restaurant and told me funny stories about Severus. Ginny and Harry walked close but didn't touch nor talk, I noticed that they liked to be close but just couldn't be intimate like they used to be. Molly and Arthur held hands and he occasionally leant in to kiss her, they were so sweet together.

Severus suddenly grabbed me and lifted me up off the ground plopping me into a fireman's hold and patting my bum as he walked. I hung over his back and made faces at Remus and Tonks as we walked. Although it was a somewhat undignified pose I relaxed and enjoyed the ride. We were just a group of friends out for a walk in the Saturday afternoon sunshine together. Life was good, I was happy and my new life as Mrs. Snape had just begun.

I'd have to say that one of the most enjoyable sights at our mini reception was Arthur and the chopsticks. Molly had brought a camera too and was busily snapping pictures of Arthur posing with anyone who would stay still for a minute. I couldn't imagine what the sushi eating Muggles thought of our group and decided that a private room might be a good idea.

We looked somewhat like a middle-aged Goth group gone wrong. Harry knew all about weddings and was wearing a very nice charcoal gray suit with an emerald tie that matched his eye colour; Severus wore a black tuxedo with black pants pin striped with charcoal, he also wore a lovely white dress shirt, cummerbund and black bow tie (yum). Remus wore his best purple robe which was somewhat reminiscent of Albus Dumbledore; and Tonks looked like she'd raided an Oxfam shop for the one dress that screamed '_Save me'_ with huge red roses, it was gaily topped off by one of the late Queen Mum's hats. The Weasley's were all dressed in robes and Arthur wore a green jester's cap complete with bells. Apparently it was his favourite hat since Fred and George gave it to him for a Christmas past and he thought it rather stylish. Maybe we'd be mistaken for a circus troupe instead of escaped mental patients.

Arthur was a tad miffed to miss the sushi train (he'd finally stopped the Choo Choo sounds) but when I offered to buy him his very own chopsticks he promised to behave. He pouted and Molly gave him a big kiss. That seemed to go a long way towards placating him. Ginny whispered in my ear that Molly had slipped him a potion to make him happier as he had been terribly morose since the Ron affair yesterday. He'd be joyfully over happy for at least another 4 hours so I should enjoy it while it lasted.

We ordered a wide variety of different food and were having a lovely time together. Arthur did well skewering the sushi and sashimi on a single chopstick but the soba noodles seemed to evade him. Tonks had a run in with the wasabi and her hair turned bright red as did her face. Everyone found that funny but only Remus earned a punch on the arm for his troubles. Molly managed to get a photo. The sake flowed and all was happy in our little world.

Remus and Tonks were telling funny stories and as everyone watched them Severus leaned close to me and whispered in my ear "_I can't wait to get you alone_" he then placed his hand on my thigh under the table and nipped me on the neck.

When he turned back to the table I lent in licking his ear lobe as I ran my hand between his legs barely skimming his privates "_Neither can I_". I felt him shudder with barely contained excitement as I smiled and winked at Molly as she caught my eye.

"_Come along everyone, finish up. I'm sure these two love birds need some time alone before the ball tonight_" Molly winked back at us. "_We can all visit them again over the next few weeks and share the photo's around_."

Thankfully when Molly spoke everyone listened. The last of the food was consumed in record time and our guests toasted us with the remaining sake. I was going to pay the bill when Harry produced his credit card. "_It's on me Love_" he said. Before leaving I bought some souvenirs for Arthur to show his friends at work.

* * *

We walked to the nearby alley and each person hugged and kissed Severus and I before apparating away. I sincerely hoped our wedding didn't cause anyone to splinch on the way back to their homes. Last people left were Remus and Tonks.

"_I told you so Chicken Boy_" Remus said as he poked Severus good-naturedly in the ribs. "_She loves you, she loves you not…_"

"_Come on Romeo lets go get laid_" Tonks grabbed Remus who winked at us then disappeared with a loud pop kissing his multi-hued lover on the lips.

* * *

Finally it was just Severus and I alone in an alley in Central London. He turned to me and put his arms around my waist. I responded by putting mine around his neck.

As he leant in to kiss me we apparated to the gates of Hogwarts. He pushed me back against the metal fence and deepened the kiss until I shuddered with a mini orgasm. I moaned loudly in ecstasy and brought my hands down onto his bottom squeezing his cheeks as he roughly thrust his crotch into mine grinding his erection against me. He growled aloud in torment.

When we finally broke the kiss I was panting heavily as was Severus. He grabbed my hand and we ran all the way to the Castle slipping quietly in by a hidden side door that took us directly to the dungeons and Severus' waiting chambers.


	9. Into the Snakes Lair

**Chapter 9**

**Into the Snakes Lair**

**

* * *

**

**Beware – Sex scene ahead – I tried to water it down a bit and it took ages to write it.**

**

* * *

**

I thought we were doing particularly well as we hadn't run into any students yet. Home stretch, one corridor away from our goal.

"_Professor!_" a gaggle of young females appeared and enveloped Severus stopping him in his tracks.

I couldn't catch the conversation, it all seemed to be coming out in teenage girl speak. I wasn't very good at the language when I was 14 and it seems my skills hadn't improved with age.

They soon had him backed against the wall and were asking a multitude of inane questions covering all aspects of potions, Quiddich and Common Room problems.

Like well-rehearsed predators they had cut me away from their beloved Head of House and two girls soon had me bailed up. Their similarities to Pansy Parkinson and co were remarkable.

"_Hello_" I cooed "_How are you both?_"

They sized me up and the eldest of the girls sneered. I noted the sneer did nothing for her rather plain face.

"_Who are you?_" she sneered.

"_We've heard a rumour_" the other added acting like an extra from a rather bad muggle police show.

"_Have you_" I countered.

"_Yeah_" she came back "_You a nurse?_" she eyed my white uniform. The other girl snickered.

"_Actually_" I said in my best condescending tone "_I'm an Officer in the Royal Army. I've just married Professor Snape so you can lay off the act, he's mine now so get used to it_."

Their faces flickered with surprise at my missive and they both stepped back from me as I shoved purposefully forward toward the pack that had surrounded Severus.

"_Ladies_" I said loudly clapping my hands for attention. The clamour stopped immediately and all eyes were on me as I stood beside Severus to address them. "_I am Captain Granger of the Royal Artillery, I'm also Professor Snape's wife. You may refer to me as either Captain Granger or Lady Snape. Am I understood_?"

They stared at me in astonishment until Severus spoke out. "_You heard Lady Snape, be polite girls. Remember you are Slytherin Witches, not a gaggle of geese._"

An unenthusiastic chorus of "_Yes Sir_" erupted from the mass.

"_You shall treat me the same as you would treat your Professor, I will not tolerate insolence or back talk. Do you understand_?" I boomed at them in my best parade ground voice.

"_Yes Ma'am_" they chorused again.

"_I shall organise a tea within the next few days so that your whole house may meet me. Until then Professor Snape and I wish to have some privacy_."

The girls looked from me to Severus inquiringly. "_Lady Snape is an accomplished Witch and I wouldn't want any of you hexed_" Severus told the girls "_Now be polite to my wife or I will know about it_" he narrowed his gaze eyeing each girl for a second.

"_Professor Snape, if you will_" I inclined my head to him and turned towards the entrance to his quarters. He followed me and the girls quickly dispersed to spread the gossip.

* * *

We were safe inside his classroom leaning our backs against the door that Severus had locked and warded. "_Lady Snape_" he chuckled.

"_They were like a pack of Hyena's, we're lucky they didn't go for our throats_" I laughed back.

"_They're rather good aren't they_" he smirked "_True Slytherin tactics_" he was proud of his girls even though they had turned on his wife.

"_I guess if I'm going to be Lady Snape I'd best save for some outlandish emeralds_"

"_I've got some in our Gringott's vault, we can go next week when we see the family lawyer_" he countered.

My eyes widened in surprise.

"_Other than the rather run down Spinners End we own a nice Country House near Bath and some stocks and bonds. There's not much money per se as it's mainly tied up in investments, but our children will be well taken care of if anything happens to us_" he finished.

'_Hmm, our children, emeralds, country house'_ I thought, things are looking up.

"_Well all I've got is an investment block of flats in Hogsmeade I bought with the money my Gran left me_." I said.

He nodded his head "_Decent._"

"_Come on_" he grabbed my hand "_Grand tour time_"

* * *

It wasn't much of a Grand Tour, we did a double time march through the office, ran through the sitting room, and finally arrived in the bedroom.

"_This is the Bedroom_," he said with a flourish before grabbing me around the waist and launching us both onto the bed. Severus performed a truly Olympian vault and I landed on top of him hoping I didn't crush his family jewels.

I giggled. When had I become a giggler I wondered? His hands were all over me looking for the best way to get me out of my uniform before we both died of frustration. All we managed to do was kick our shoes off.

"_Hang on_" I cried and managed to get up into a kneeling position. He lay flat on his back looking up at me smiling.

"_Happy?_" I asked him as I started to undo his bow tie.

"_Incredibly_" he replied. I knew it was true. This love of ours had been a long time coming and finally here we were together and nothing could ruin it for us.

I unbuttoned, unzipped, stripped and kissed him until he was before me in only his silk boxers.

Slowly I started to strip starting with my suit coat. "_Accio chair_" I draped the coat on the chair so as not to damage the braids. With a flick of my hand my trousers were off and neatly folded on the back of the chair as well. Finally I peeled off my silk camisole revealing a white underwire stretchy lace teddy that I'd bought that morning from Madame Malkins.

"_I find wandless magic so sexy_" he told my breasts as I moved to straddle him. He looked up at my face as his hands ran up my thighs and settled onto my hips. "_Thank you Hermione._"

"_My husband_" I said smiling back at him.

I started to rub his upper body beginning at his stomach, ribs then chest. I became fascinated by his nipples and leant over to lick and suck each one in turn. Severus shifted himself slightly then wove his hands into my hair and breathed deeply letting out a sigh of pleasure.

After a few minutes he drew my face up to his and we started to kiss, my hands sliding up to his shoulders. Severus was slow and gentle, quite purposeful in his motions and terribly passionate. I found his kisses to be breathtaking and melted into him sliding my body so that I was now lying on top of him. He spread his legs and wound one around mine as he began to slowly move his hips to rub his erection against me. I felt him grow harder and the anticipation made me gasp between kisses.

"_It's ok_" he whispered in a concerned voice "_I won't hurt you_" he continued in the gentle rubbing and thrusting motion as he watched my face.

"_It's not that_" I gasped out at him "_I'm just so excited and it feels wonderful_."

"_Really_" he chuckled before latching onto my neck and elicited a surprised yelp that quickly turned into a moan of pleasure.

"_Sev_" I groaned as I rubbed the full length of my body against his. His hands wound around my body, one coming to rest on my bum the other rubbing up and down my back.

"_Yes_" he countered my groan "_so good_."

I rose up on my hands again and pushed hard into his groin. Severus gasped and moved his hands up to my straps and lowered them off my shoulders. I sat up so he could lower them further and he watched my face as he did. The bodice was still covering my breasts as I again lowered myself to him and ran my tongue over his lower lip, nipping gently. I took control of the kissing and forced a hard kiss sucking and thrusting with my tongue until I felt heady with loss of oxygen.

When I finally took a breath Severus rolled his head back arching into my pelvis and pulling down on my hips. His face was a mask of ecstasy with his pupils being heavily dilated as he pulled me back down onto his body before rolling us onto the side.

I slid my leg between his and gently continued to rub my thigh against him. His groans told me more than words could as he gently moved me onto my back. My leg was still between his and he rose up and thrust hard into my thigh giving me an indication of how ready he was for me. I lifted my other leg and wrapped it around his calf rubbing my foot up and down the back of his leg.

It was my turn to arch my back in pleasure "_Oh Sev, feels so good_" I moaned. His mouth found my chest as his hands pulled down the teddy to my waist. He took one breast in his hand experimentally feeling its texture and weight whilst his mouth lowered to the other. Licking my nipple he tweaked the other and I gasped.

"_Does that hurt, do you want me to stop_?" he murmured against my nipple. My only answer was to pull him back down and arch into his mouth. He mumbled something incoherently with his mouth full.

"_Shhh_" I said "_I love it, love you. Oh Sev yes_" I arched my back and shoved myself into his erection groaning loudly.

He continued to lick and suck my nipples as his hand traveled down my body to rest over my centre. Palming and pushing with his thigh I could feel the pressure building on my clit and I was so excited and ready all I wanted was for him to fuck me hard and make me scream.

"_Want you_" I moaned, rising up I pushed him down by the shoulders as I spread my legs and forced him to lie between my thighs. I'd lost the connection of his penis as he slid down my body leaving a trail of hot wet kisses.

I reached up over my head and gripped the iron railing of the bed head and pulled myself up to brace myself. Severus continued to trail down my body, finally kneeling between my legs and raising my bottom up so he could pull the teddy completely down. I flicked my hand and it landed on the chair with my other clothes.

He peeled off his own boxers letting his penis bounce free of its silken confines. I hadn't seen him erect before now and was delighted at his size. I lay back and wished he would just impale me on it now.

"_Beautiful_" he murmured as he rubbed his hand over my pubic mound gently dipping a finger in to rub over my clit and test my wetness.

"_Oh Goddess_" I arched and pushed against the bed head trying to force his finger to enter me. He didn't resist and his index finger slid deep inside me. I gasped in pleasure and he removed the digit and licked it first before he lowered his face closer to enjoy me.

I spread my legs wide as his mouth descended. His tongue flicked over my clit then lapped up and down tasting me. I groaned and after a few more licks he thrust his tongue into my opening pulling my thighs wide with his hands and pushing my legs up with his shoulder. At this pace I seriously thought I wouldn't last long.

He continued his cunnilingus "_Cum for me baby_" he enticed me between licks. His hand strayed into the action and he thrust two fingers inside me as he sucked my clit. I arched up and let out a gasp of pleasure. I hadn't cum with a partner for a while and it felt incredible to have the man I loved begging me to orgasm for him. The thrusting and sucking continued and I found that I couldn't stand the pace any longer.

Arching up I felt the intensity of my orgasm sweep over me and I spasmed. He felt it and inserted another finger and thrust the three in and out of me. I screamed his name and released the bed head grabbing his hair and pushing my pelvis up to suffocate him in between my thighs.

"_Sev_" I moaned again as the last of the sensation finally died down and I collapsed back releasing him. I felt breathless like I'd just run a marathon, was starting to perspire and couldn't wipe the grin off my face.

Severus crawled up my body and settled himself between my legs holding me close and comforting me. He was so good, I felt so good. If this was any indication of his enthusiasm for sex I knew that this marriage was going to be very fruitful indeed.

"_I want you_," he said looking deeply into my eyes. I grinned and pulled his mouth down to mine as I thrust my pelvis up against his cock rubbing it between my folds and spreading my wetness along his shaft.

"_I want you too_" I groaned and he latched onto my nipple sucking hard and making a very animal grunting noise thrusting against me trying to push his way inside.

I spread my legs wider and he managed to push his cock into me on the next thrust. He released my breast and arched his back pushing hard and completely filling me.

Once inside he slowed his thrusts and started to kiss me again, deeply tonguing my mouth as his cock sheathed itself repeatedly. The sensation of his slow and sensual fucking had me moaning deeply and moving in rhythm to match his thrusts. I wound one hand in his hair as he lay fully on me burying his face in my neck, and the other on his back feeling his heat. I lay there rocking gently with him and simply enjoyed the sensation of his movements, listening to his low grunts and groans. I loved the fact that he wasn't in a rush and was taking his time to enjoy our first time together.

After a few minutes of this steady rhythm his movements became less coordinated and his panting exaggerated. The friction pushed me over the edge and I groaned and spasmed into my second orgasm dragging him along with me. He then collapsed and lay still, the sound of his breathing the only indication that he was still with the living. I wrapped my arms around him and held him still as I kissed his hair and waited for him to come back to me.

After a few minutes he lifted his head from my neck and looked up into my eyes, his hand moving to stroke my cheek.

"_I'm a bit rusty_" he smiled meekly at me.

"_Is that what that was_" I quipped "_I thought I heard creaking_"

He laughed back "_You're wonderful you know. I've waited so long for someone to love and here you are. Hermione Snape, my wife!_"

"_I've traveled the world and heard all sorts of languages spoken but that's the best thing I've ever heard. I love you too Severus Snape_" I returned "_Thank you for everything_." I felt a single tear roll down my cheek, Severus smiled and leant in to kiss it away.

"_You're welcome_" was his response and I knew he meant it, I was truly welcome.

* * *

I fell asleep in my husband's arms and awoke with a start hearing my name.

"_Mistress Snape, awaken please!_" I peered over the edge of the bed at the short person who was calling my name.

"_Is that you Dobby_?" I asked still bleary from sleep.

"_Yes Mistress Snape, Dobby is pleased to serve you_" the little fellow proudly returned with a flourish and bow.

"_What's the time Dobby_"

"_Time to dress for the ball Mistress, 7:30 in the evening. Do you wish Winky to help you_?" he asked.

I sat up holding the sheet to my body so poor Dobby didn't have to see me in the nude "_I'll be right Dobby, thank you for the offer_"

"_As the Mistress wishes_" he replied bowing before vanishing with a click of his fingers and a cheeky grin.

"_Honey_" I shook Severus awake "_Time to dress for the ball_"

"_Bugger it_" Severus said and turned to wrap his arms around my waist pulling me back down on the bed "_I don't want to go, lets sleep_" he pushed his face into my abdomen and feigned sleep.

"_Come on baby, Minerva is expecting us_" I ran my nails across his scalp eliciting a groan from my half-asleep lover. "_The sooner we get there the sooner we can leave and come back here_"

He opened one eye and looked up at me and growled, I smiled down at him and he started to crawl up the bed to lay fully on top of me.

Finally nose to nose with me he said, "_I can't intimidate you any more can I_?"

"_No Professor Snape you can't_"

"_And, pray tell, when did I become your baby_?" he chuckled and stuck his tongue out at me making a rather unbecoming sound for an adult. I laughed back, this was bliss.

* * *

After a quick shower, or at least it would have been quick if we hadn't jumped in together and decided that sex in the shower was loads of fun, we dressed for the ball. My new dress was as lovely as Lavender and Padma thought it would be.

"_I must thank Misses Brown and Patil next time I see them_" Severus exclaimed "_I must say it looks lovely on you Lady Snape_"

"_Why thank you Professor_" I replied with a curtsey.

"_With those wings perhaps you're the bat of the dungeons now_" he laughed as he took my hand and we swept up the stairs together.

"_The Evil Mrs. Snape, Bat woman, Captain Chaos. Excellent_" I laughed in my most evil way.

At this he stopped and looked at me appraisingly _"Damn woman, did you drink that potion in the purple bottle?_" he snickered "_It's going to be a long marriage isn't it_?" there was a grimace of fear on his face, a fake grimace luckily.

I had nothing left to say so instead took a leaf out of Nymphadora Tonk's book and punched him on the arm.

* * *

**Note:** I know the reviews have said WRITE WRITE NOW ! But you know it's hard when you have a full time job and part time uni and a husband who needs to be fed and nurtured and 2 cats and knitting projects and ARGH ! Rubber room time - get me a time turner now!


	10. The Last Waltz

**Chapter 10 **

**The Last Waltz**

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We finally made it up to the Great Hall for the ball. Most of the students stared in amazement at Dracula and the Dark Fairy entering hand in hand, some of the younger ones looked terrified at the smile on the Vampire's face.

Severus swept me into a waltz immediately and we glided around the dance floor, my Dark Prince and I. It was our first dance as husband and wife and I was enjoying myself so much that I hoped this moment would last forever.

As the song finished we joined Minerva and the other teachers. Those who had not been present at our wedding that day congratulated Severus and I heartily. I suspect they were delighted that finally their Potions Master had a reason to be happy and might possibly become less snarky.

* * *

I danced with Remus, Hagrid and Harry. All the Weasley family was present, excepting Ron of course and Charlie. Each of the boys took their turn to dance with me, George and Fred being the most comical of my partners. Finally I was swept up into the arms of none other than Percy Weasley. 

"_If I might say so Miss Granger you are looking quite lovely tonight_" he elucidated.

"_Why thank you Percy, you're very kind_" I simpered back at him.

The dance was almost at an end when he asked if he might talk to me privately. I wondered what he could possibly want. We walked to the exit and stood in the chill night air quite alone.

"_I'd like to thank you for helping my family yesterday Hermione_" he said in his most formal voice "_The last thing our family needs is more scandal as you can quite imagine_."

"_Yes Percy I understand_" what I didn't understand was where this conversation might be leading.

"_Yes, of course I knew you would. I'd like to show you my appreciation if I might_."

Uh oh, here it comes I thought "_Um, that's not really necessary Percy honestly_"

"_Oh I think it is Hermione and I know exactly how to show you how I feel_" he took my hands in his.

Oh no, I hoped that he didn't intend to kiss me. Where was that husband of mine now that his first challenger was here. I mentally tried to call Severus to me.

"_No, Percy it's quite alright really_" I tried to escape him.

"_No my dear, I insist_" he went on "_After yesterday I decided that you were a very powerful and determined witch, just what my career needs at the moment_"

Huh? Severus save me!

"_No my dear, don't say anything yet_" I tried to look panic stricken but he didn't seem to notice, maybe women always looked like that when he was around them.

"_I have decided to propose marriage to you_," he said.

"_It would do your standing in the magical community good to be married into a respectable Pure Blood family and as a friend of Harry Potter it would increase my chances of career advancement within the Ministry to be your husband_."

I felt ill. Really ill actually. Percy Weasley had just proposed to me and all I wanted to do was puke. Where the hell was Severus when I needed him.

"_Of course I would find you a respectable entry level job within the Ministry as a secretary or some such_" the idiot was primping before me.

"_You must understand that your current job is most unsuitable for a Ministry officials wife_."

"_I would allow you to work outside the home until the children came along. That will have to be soon of course due to your advanced age, though I'm willing to overlook that."_

The look on his face told me he had thought this through and I would be a good acquisition to further his career and feather his nest. How positively disgusting and pompous it all sounded.

I opened my mouth to tell him he was too late as I was already wed.

"_Tut, tut, sweet Love, there is no need to thank me yet. You will meet me at the Ministry tomorrow at 3 and we shall be wed then. Won't it just be too lovely to have me as a husband_" he raised my hands to his mouth and kissed the back of them soundly. Between my bile and the squelch of his kiss I prayed for a Death Eater to use an unforgivable on me right now.

My mouth curved up in a grimace and all the noise I could make was a pained gurgle. Somehow he managed to take this as a sign of agreement to his terms. His smile beaming at me only aggravated my nausea.

I felt hands snake around my waist from behind and hoped it was the saviour Death Eater.

"_Mr. Weasley, Captain Granger_" the cavalry had finally arrived.

"_Professor Snape, good news, I am to wed Miss Granger tomorrow!_" Percy beamed at Severus.

"_Oh really_" he drawled in reply loosening his grip on my waist and sliding his hands down onto my hips instead "_And Captain Granger has acquiesced to your offer of matrimony?_"

"_Of course, Professor, and why shouldn't she_?" he puffed out his chest at my husband. Somehow Percy had completely missed the possessive hold Severus had on my person.

I felt the fingers grip my hips tighter. Turning my head slightly I whispered through gritted teeth "_For Merlin's sake save me from this prick_!" I turned back to Percy and tried to dislodge my hands from his. He held on tightening his grip.

Magically George and Fred appeared on either side of me. They certainly had a nose for trouble and had sniffed out a doozy this time.

"_Perce_" they both said in unison looking at his hands clasping mine "_Whatcha doin'_?"

"_He's just asked Captain Granger for her hand and apparently she has accepted_" Severus drawled.

It was quite obvious the twins were wanting to laugh themselves stupid and were barely containing their mirth. It seemed that Percy was the only Weasley not to have heard the good news of our nuptials.

"_Good on you Perce_" George slapped him on the back.

"_Yeah great move_" Fred slapped the other side.

"_Bit of a problem though mate_" George continued.

"_Yeah, she's already hitched_" Fred added smiling widely.

Percy immediately dropped my hands in shock "_No, you are both mistaken. I checked at the Ministry yesterday and Miss Granger is not married I assure you_!"

"_I'm afraid so Percy_" I said "_I'm married to a man who's turned on by khaki, isn't wanting to enslave me, and doesn't expect me to be a baby breeding machine_"

"_The swine!_" Percy shrieked "_I will duel him for your hand_" he whipped out his wand and took up a fencing pose straight out of a Hollywood silent film.

George and Fred couldn't contain themselves any longer and broke into hysterical laughter.

I felt myself being lifted bodily out of the way by Severus. His wand was quickly wedged into Percy's throat.

"_Lady Snape does not need to be harassed by the likes of you Weasley and I'm sure she did not accept your proposal. Now bugger off before you embarrass yourself further_" he poked Percy in the neck with his wand. "_Leave my wife alone_" he finished with an extra poke.

With a strangled cry of anguish Percy Weasley fainted dead away onto the paving stones.

"_Ouch_" I said. The men grimaced at the thud of Percy hitting stone.

"_I'll get mum, this is her department_" Fred said before leaving. George patted Severus on the shoulder and chuckled before following his brother back into the hall.

I turned to Severus and shrugged my shoulders "_I didn't agree to anything Love, he's such a pompous prick that I couldn't manage to get a word in edgeways_!"

Severus looked solemnly down at my face before taking my hands in his. He gently rubbed his thumbs over their backs "_Would you care to dance Lady Snape_?"

* * *

Severus and I danced the remainder of the night away, laughing and drinking. It was the best reception any bride could have hoped for. At the end of the night Minerva announced our marriage to the remaining partygoers and three cheers rose into the night with the clinking of glasses.

* * *

We were mildly inebriated and decided to go out for a walk in the night air. Remus and Tonks joined us to enjoy the stars by the lake. The moon was at a waxing quarter and smiled down illuminating the grounds. I laughed at a joke Severus told me then jumped up to run away from our small group. 

"_Catch me_" I called to him as I dashed down towards the gates in my bare feet, my wings flapping behind me.

After giving me a small head start he raced after me. I dived behind a tree and felt his arms close around my waist. I giggled turning around to comment on his tracking skills when the words died on my lips.

I was in the arms of a robed Death Eater. I felt his wand poking my side and my eyes widened in shock.

"_I told you to be careful Missy_," he said. I recognised Malfoy straight away and swallowed hard. Opening my mouth to shout out to Severus I only managed a strangled cry before I felt the pull of a portkey drag me away from Hogwarts.

Racing to the place where my cry had escaped the only remains Severus found were my wings that Malfoy had ripped from my back and left on the ground. Picking them up he turned around in a circle holding the wings and cried out my name into the night.

"_Hermioneeee_!"

Returning to the group dumbstruck he dropped the wings into Remus' lap.

"_She's gone_" was all he managed to say before collapsing into a heap, his head falling impotently onto the grass.


	11. Prisoner of Love

**Extreme Prejudice **

**Chapter 11 - Prisoner of Love**

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**A/N** – For Kitty who gave me a very nice review for "_Testing Times_" my other fan-fic. If you ever meet Kitty make sure you look into her beautiful ocean blue eyes… yes well, ok that's a tad sicko but she tells me it's one of her most striking features. You go girl!

* * *

A thorough check of the grounds with Aurors and Fang the bloodhound managed to only find the traces of magical residue from portkey travel. They couldn't determine who had grabbed me, what their motive was, or where I could possibly have been taken.

Percy was a suspect but he was safely ensconced at the Burrow crying about being the injured party. Practical jokes were ruled out after questioning the Twins. No ransom demands had been received or other threats. There was a suggestion that I had faked my own disappearance to escape my husband, Hagrid had to restrain Severus from attacking the offending Auror who suggested that scenario.

After much shouting and cursing Severus was now sitting mutely in the Headmistresses office looking like someone had run over his dog. All the Order of the Phoenix members were present trying to come up with a plan. It seemed quite hopeless, my Snape had many enemies but how many of them knew of his connection to me.

* * *

_Severus' POV (first person point of view)_

It's just fucking typical. Married for less than 24 hours and already my wife had been taken from me. This smacks of the Dark Lord; it wouldn't surprise me if one of his stupid minions decided to get into his good books by doing this. My Dark Mark hasn't summonsed me for a few weeks now so I don't know what's going on. I'm certain that one of my students told someone about Hermione and that's why she's gone.

The Aurors, pack of idiots. '_Do you have any enemies Professor Snape?'_ _– "Do you have any fucking brains?_" I'd asked back. I had more enemies than they'd had hot breakfasts, that wouldn't help finding my wife. If I'd been thinking at the time I would have put a tracking spell on the wedding ring. That sort of thing was usually used to track unfaithful wives, not kidnapped ones.

They suggested I wait for a ransom note to arrive. It's 6 am; she's been gone since 2 – 4 hours and no peep from a kidnapper. As a Death Eater I knew that we didn't send out ransom notes, I also knew you'd have to be very, very stupid to take Hermione captive. She was a one-woman killing machine, I pitied her captors if she was still alive. I decided to wait until 7 then start doing the rounds of the usual suspects. Potter offered to accompany me to cover my back, not that I need it but he seems as anxious about Hermione as I do. As much as I dislike the boy I know he's trustworthy when it comes to his friends. Lets hope my new found trust isn't misplaced.

Back in the dungeons sitting on the bed with Hermione's uniform coat laid over my lap as a security blanket, I look in her bag for any clues. She's got the usual travel items; a diary / notebook with contact numbers for the army and family; a mobile phone, switched off; one of those cheap pocket sized photo albums with pictures mainly of military types and scenic locations – I recognise her parents; uncle and aunt; the golden trio; her squad posed in an action shot; and the one of us in Kyoto. I feel a tear aching to slip down my face and sniff it away. All the photos are charmed to look like Muggle pictures, I guess she didn't want to be found out.

At the bottom of the bag is a handgun. I've never held one before and take it out of its holster to examine it. It's not very big and smells of machine oil. I don't know if it's loaded or not, so decide not to fool around with it. There's also a small pouch of bullets attached to the holster. Putting the gun carefully on the bed I shake out a bullet onto my hand and examine it. It's hard to believe that these innocuous little things can kill a man, but then again a slender piece of wood can do the same.

I lean against the bedpost and examine Hermione's things spread out before me. I can't see any obvious clues, nothing to lead me to her kidnapper. As a last thought to try everything possible I take out my wand and move it over the bed looking for traces of magic. All her clothes glow slightly as they've been close to her skin and she's inherently magical. Nothing here, nothing but the remains of the woman I love. I pick up her dog tags and slip them around my neck and under my shirt just so I can be close to her.

There's a knock at my door and in walk Lupin and Potter. Lupin gives me a mug of coffee and they wait quietly for me to drink some of it. Potter picks up the photo album and flicks through it with a wisp of a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. I see him trace the outline of one with his finger and get a small tinge of jealousy but bite it back. I try to remember that we all want the same thing right now, Hermione back here safe and sound.

We don't have a clue where to start so Potter asks if there's a potion that can be brewed to track her, maybe someone can scry. Now he sounds as desperate as I do. As hideous as it sounds we decide to go to see that crazy bitch Trelawny up in the tower, maybe she knows how to scry for missing people. It's a long shot, but the only one we have.

* * *

**Meanwhile Back At the Malfoy Manor...**

We're back with Hermione.

I've been lying here for what seems like hours. My mouth is covered in gaffer tape, hands behind my back tied with what feels like a plastic cable tie, my feet are held with more tape. I'm warm and as comfortable as possible under the circumstances, it feels like I'm lying on a bed.

"_Pop_"

Someone has just apparated into the room. I can't talk and there's a blanket over my head so I lie still and pretend to be asleep.

Someone lifts the blanket, I don't know who. They're very quiet. I sniff carefully to see if I can detect any peculiar odours. Then I feel something poke my shoulder and I open my eyes.

It's a House Elf. She looks me straight in the face with curiosity but doesn't say anything. Strangely for an Elf I notice she has the most amazing ocean blue eyes. Beautiful and mysterious, I wonder for a moment if anyone ever notices these small things that make an Elf unique. I try to make a sound but it comes out all wrong so I do some expressions with my eyes at her. Either she's very smart or very dumb, I can't tell from the look she's giving me.

I'd been around House Elves quite a bit when I was a student and they are usually jumpy and eager to please. All except Dobby of course, and he was a Malfoy elf once. Hopefully I can appeal to this small one if she gives me the opportunity to talk to her. She reaches out a hand and touches my hair lifting a section to fondle a short curl, wrapping it around her long finger she sighs.

"_You is another pretty for the Master_" she says.

'_Oh shit'_ I think, '_I'm another in a long line of play things Lucius has brought home_'. I'm thinking _Silence of the Lambs_ meets _The Collector_ and hope for the latter. The Last thing I want is to be made into a Mother skin suit for Lucius to wear.

"_You looks so different to the Mistress, she all blond and tall, you is strong and brown_" she comments wistfully.

I know a little occulmency and try to reach out to the Elf. She looks into my eyes at that moment and I look straight into her mind.

"_Ow_" she jumps back in fright "_You is a Witch, Kitty is sorry, bad Kitty_" she bangs her head on the bedpost. "_Mistress will be very angry_!"

Kitty the House Elf leaves with a snap of her fingers before I manage to do anything else. Sighing as best I can I collapse back onto the bed and close my eyes.

It isn't very long before the door opens and I hear shoes on the wooden floorboards. Kitty had covered me with the blanket again before she left so I can't see who has just come into the room, but by the sound of the shoes I'd say it's a woman.

The blanket is whipped off my body and I open my eyes immediately to the person standing over me. Draco's mother, Narcissa Malfoy, is looking at me with a look of complete annoyance. Kitty the Elf is standing next to her pulling on an ear with a very worried expression on her face. Very odd to say that I notice they both have the same eye colour.

"_You say she looked into your mind Kitty_" Narcissa demanded of the Elf.

"_Yes Mistress_" Kitty replied.

Narcissa sat down heavily on the bed beside me and moved the hair off of my face.

"_No funny business now do you hear. I'm going to uncover your mouth_" she said.

I nodded and the tape hurt as she pulled it off my mouth. I moved my tongue around trying to lubricate it with some saliva so I could talk. Narcissa simply stared at me waiting for me to make the first move.

"_Hello Mrs. Malfoy_" I croaked out. "_Hello Kitty_" I said to the Elf.

This had a dual effect. The Elf hid and Narcissa covered her face with her hands. It was very quiet for a few minutes until she uncovered her eyes only and looked at me again through her splayed fingers.

"_Who are you_?" she asked quietly through her muffled mouth.

"_Lady Snape_" I said simply.

Any emotion she had at my missive she hid well. Narcissa stood up and lifted the blanket off me to observe my bindings. Taking her wand out of her sleeve she started to untie me as Kitty popped out and back with a drink.

"_You have to understand_" Narcissa started to tell me "_Lucius has a problem. He likes to collect girls. Nothing devious, he just likes to bring them home and play with them for a while. He needs help but the Doctors seem to think it's just a male mid life crisis that he'll eventually grow out of. Draco has tried to help him too, but we simply can't watch him all the time_." She finished untying me and helped me to sit up before rubbing my wrists to improve the circulation.

I took the glass she offered and had a long drink, Lemonade, cold and soothing. As I massaged my legs to get some feeling back I started to speak.

"_I was at a club in Diagon Alley last week and Lucius spoke to me there_" I said. "_I only married Severus yesterday, he must be hysterical by now._"

"_I'll floo him_" Narcissa said "_Please go easy on Lucius_" her face showed the anguish one would feel when a husband was ill.

"_Of course_" I said standing up with her help.

* * *

We walked down the stairs towards the main living room of the manor. It was a large house and it seemed I had been secreted in one of the more secluded rooms. I wondered what it must be like for Mrs. Malfoy to be stuck alone in this house all day with no one but a slightly deranged husband for company.

It seemed I was wrong. When we came into the living room I was met by none other than Draco Malfoy and his son sitting on a rug together building a castle with Lego. He looked up with surprise as I came in.

"_Granger_" he exclaimed sizing up my rumpled dress and hair "_What in Hades are you doing here_?"

"_Lady Snape has been your father's guest_" Narcissa managed to say before I even opened my mouth.

"_Lady Snape_" Draco repeated.

I smiled "_It's been a while hasn't it Draco_?"

The boy who looked like he was about 4 years old smiled and held out some Lego pieces towards me. I smiled back and wiggled my fingers at him.

"_Draco dear_" Narcissa drew his attention "_Could you floo over to Hogwarts and bring Severus here please_?"

Draco looked at his mother, then to me, and finally at his son playing on the rug. "_Is this going to get roug_h" he asked gesturing towards his son.

"_I don't imagine so_" I replied.

He nodded then retrieved his cloak before turning to leave. "_Be good for Nan_" he told his smiling son then he walked over to the fireplace and left the Manor in a swirl of green light. Kitty took his place on the rug and was evidently enjoying playing with the Lego as much as the youngest Malfoy.

I couldn't help but smile at the Elf and child playing even though I knew Severus would be furious with Lucius when he finally arrived. Narcissa brought some tea to me and we settled in for a quiet chat, it seemed all so very genteel and polite but I had a feeling it wouldn't last long.


	12. They saw, she saw and off he ran

**Chapter 12**

**They Saw, She Saw and Off He Ran.**

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* * *

**

Severus, Remus and Harry trouped up to the Divination Tower to ask Sybil Trelawny for help in finding me. Harry and Remus had finished Divination in NEWTS and knew all the basics, although Severus and I thought it was a huge crock. It was hard to believe that Sybil had been a Slytherin and was only 3 years older than Severus and Remus. I thought she was just an old fraud, but apparently she'd had her moments and had come up with a couple of believable prophecies.

Sybil always dressed the part, with her scarves, beads and baubles you'd mistake her for a carnival fortuneteller. Perhaps it was the standard uniform for seers, '_dress yea as a caravan gypsy would_'. I always thought it was the eyes. Because she was incredibly short sighted her glasses were as thick as coke bottles. This made her eyes look enormously magnified and quite scary to the nervous students. I think I'm one of the only ones that actually walked out on her class and refused to go back, apparently she'd foretold I'd do that. Uh huh!

The men chatted all the way up to the Tower. Aimless chat tossing back and forth theories on where I might be. It took about 15 minutes to get to the top of the stairs and they paused before opening the door.

"_You'd better let me talk to Sybil it might make things easier_" Remus suggested.

Severus nodded in agreement; he really didn't want to have to choke the Seer to make her comply with his request.

Harry opened the door and went to enter the room first but froze suddenly listening intently.

"_Shhh, can you hear that_?" he asked the other men.

They paused on the threshold and listened carefully. A low moan echoed through the chamber.

"_Peeves_?" Remus turned and whispered to Severus.

Severus shrugged and took another step inside the narrow entryway and listened. The moan was louder this time and sounded like someone was in pain. He motioned to the others to be quiet and follow him into the room; Harry and Remus formed a single file and followed Severus into the dark incense filled chamber.

The groans grew in intensity the further into the room they ventured. It was dark and visibility was extremely low.

"_Ooh, Ahhhh_" the voice groaned aloud "_Yeeessssssss_!"

They quietly approached the source of the sounds until they were extremely close "_Lumos_" Severus pointed his wand towards the groans.

"_Oh crap!_" Harry grimaced and turned his back quickly running from the room and stumbling over a low table in his haste.

"_Merlin_" Remus managed to croak out though he held his footing being frozen to the spot in shock.

Severus simply laughed.

"_Turn off the fuck'n light would ya_!"

Severus laughed again louder and more hysterically than before. Remus was unable to join in as he was shocked into silence by the spotty bare white arse he couldn't help but stare at.

"_Stop laughin' ya great bat and help me up off the floor_" Argus Filch demanded.

Sybil Trelawny was trying to cover herself with her scarves but was having trouble finding them as her glasses were no where to be found.

"_Oh my_" Sybil said "_Hand me my glasses dear boy_" she waved her hand towards Remus.

Remus unfroze and like a gentleman looked around for Sybil's glasses, finding them under a nearby chair he handed them to her.

Argus Filch and Sybil Trelawny having sex on the floor amongst several brightly coloured cushions was one of the most extraordinary things Severus had ever seen. He'd thought there was not much left to amaze him in this world but this was fairly noteworthy. Who'd have thought Argus had it in him, or more precisely who'd have thought Sybil would have Argus in her. He shook his head to clear the image from his mind

'_Oh for a well placed Obliviate_' he thought.

* * *

Ten minutes later after Argus had scampered out the door clutching his clothes and Sybil had managed to find hers and dress they were seated around a table taking tea. The Seer didn't seem the least bit embarrassed by her earlier performance and was being quite the affable hostess to her guests. Harry had decided to wait outside as he didn't think he could look Sybil in the eye after what he'd witnessed. He had a rather delicate constitution for the '_Hero of the Wizarding World_' and one couldn't imagine him taking on The Dark Lord if he couldn't face a naked janitor.

"_So she is gone, taken, and we need to find her?_" Sybil rounded up the discussion.

"_Yes Sybil, that's right_" Remus answered.

"_Do you have anything personal of hers for me to use in the search_?"

Severus took the dog tags from around his neck caressing them before finally handing them to Sybil.

"_Yes, yes_" Sybil mumbled as she held the tags closing her eyes "_I see her, yes I can_" she sounded like Winky after a few butterbeers.

As much as Severus though Trelawny was a fake he was drawn in by her act and watched mesmerised as she muttered and clutched the objects tightly to her chest.

Sybil swayed and groaned as if she was still in Argus' eager arms making Severus grimace at the thought. Her eyes rolled and her head flopped back as she entered a trance like state.

"_Hermione, Hermione"_ she chanted softly.

After 10 minutes Severus was ready to give up hope. Whilst the chanting of his wife's name and the swaying of the Seer was interesting it didn't seem to be helping. Remus however was sitting on the edge of his seat expecting the unexpected from Sybil. His mouth was slightly ajar and his eyes wide as he watched her sway from side to side.

Suddenly the swaying stopped as did Sybil's breathing. She promptly collapsed on the floor and started to convulse in a seizure.

Both the men jumped up from their seats and moved the furniture away so that she didn't hurt herself in her writhing. They knew that the safest thing to do when someone had a fit was to save them from hurting themselves and allow the seizure to finish.

Just as suddenly as the convulsions started they finished. Severus and Remus looked with interest at the now still and prone Sybil, Severus shrugging at Remus before he dropped to his knees beside the woman.

"_Sybil_" Severus shook her gingerly "_Sybil, are you alright_?"

Her eyes flashed open staring at the ceiling before moving to focus on him.

"_Frolicking ferrets like to collect pretty things_" she said. 

Her eyes closed again and she drifted off with a smile playing around the edges of her mouth.

* * *

Harry was bowled over by Severus in the older mans haste to leave the Tower rooms. He watched in amazement as Severus jumped over the railing straight down to the lower levels of the castle, his robes billowing out like a mythical creature in flight. He landed with the aid of a cushioning charm on the floor of the main hallway and continued to run straight out of the doors and directly down to the gates so he could apparate away to his destination.

In his haste to leave the Castle Severus missed Draco Malfoy by only a few minutes. Draco had flooed to Minerva's office and stepped out of the fireplace as Remus burst into the room dragging Harry behind him.

Minerva was looking out the window watching her Potions Master practically flying through the air in his quest to exit the Castle grounds. The arrival of the other men did not really surprise her after that.

"_What news_?" she asked them.

In as few words as possible Draco explained the situation to everyone delicately telling of his father's recent bad behaviour. Although he was certain it was all just a misunderstanding and Severus would laugh about it later Minerva suggested they make haste back to the Manor just in case Severus' sense of humour was currently eluding him.

* * *

In the interim Kitty the House Elf had taken young Damien for a walk in the gardens whilst Hermione sat quietly watching Narcissa chastise Lucius.

"_You have to stop doing this Lucius_" she poked him in the chest with her finger and tried to sound as annoyed as she felt "_This time you've gone too far taking a witch from Hogwarts_!"

Lucius failed to see anything wrong with what he'd done. He saw a pretty girl so he collected her. At the time he wasn't aware that it was Hermione, I was just a dark angel he'd caught frolicking in the moonlight.

As poetic as his descriptions of me sounded I was getting a tad tired of this and just wanted to be back safely with my Severus. I'd suggested they just let me leave but Narcissa wanted me to wait until I was collected properly. I felt like baggage waiting on an airport carousel going round and round with no one to claim me.

Lucius kept trying to eye me around his wife who eventually had to slap his face to get his attention. She took him by his ear like an errant child and manhandled him further away from the settee I was sitting on.

As fascinating as this domestic tiff was to watch I tried to occupy myself elsewhere and looked about the room from my seat for a few minutes before pouring myself another cup of tea. The tea service was beautiful and probably very old. I must ask Narcissa where she'd bought it from…

A loud explosion had us all looking in the direction of the front door as a manic Severus burst into the living room. I immediately stood up with relief hoping my Knight had come to save me from tedium in a room without books.

"_Arghhh_" he shouted in fury launching himself bodily at Lucius. Narcissa wisely backed up to where I was standing and took my hand comfortingly.

We watched the school boy style brawl as the two old friends rolled on the floor in a frenzy of flying punches and flailing limbs. Much grunting came from both men as Lucius kicked Severus and tried to crawl away from him across the Persian Rug. Severus leapt the short distance and landed heavily upon Lucius and the brawl continued.

Without taking her eyes off the men I heard Narcissa say calmly to me "_It's been a long time coming. I always expected them to come to blows one day._" I simply squeezed her hand and continued to watch the scrap enthralled by the action.

A few minutes later the fireplace glowed green as Draco, Harry and Remus exploded into the room tripping upon each other and landing on top of Severus and Lucius.

It was _World Wrestling Federation_ gone mad as Draco trying to save his father elbowed Harry hard in the stomach by accident. Harry crumbled to the floor in pain as Remus leapt into the fray to protect "_The Boy Wonder_" and tripped on the crumpled rug landing on top of Draco. Draco fought like a cat all but hissing at his opponent as he scratched at Remus trying to shove him off of him. Remus smelt the tension and started to snarl like a rabid dog and bit Draco on the hand as it connected with his face.

That bite made Draco squeal alerting Lucius to his son's torment. He shook Severus off and jumped on top of Remus pummeling him ineffectively in the back. Harry had finally regained his feet and smiled when he saw me and managed a small wave. Narcissa and I both waved back smiling at him as Draco tackled him face first onto the rug. Severus regained his momentum and dived back into the fray locking Lucius into a half-nelson and trying desperately to break his arm.

By this point Narcissa and I had tired of the entertainment so we sat down on the settee together and had a spot of chit-chat. The tea service was indeed old and had belonged to her grandmother. Damien's mother was Pansy but she was with her mother in France for a short while visiting with relatives. We discussed the merits of child care and pre-schools and the availability of the same in the Wizarding world.

20 minutes later we grew tired of the boy scrap which continued unabated on the rug. Luckily they had not used their wands nor managed to break any of the furniture in the melee.

"_Do you think they're bruised enough yet Narcissa_" I asked.

"_Yes I suspect so, and it's almost lunch time. We best do something about it"_ she replied.

"_Allow me"_ I offered and cast a wandless spell to freeze the men in mid action.

"_Oooh, you must teach me that spell_" Narcissa enthused in delight as she walked over to the frozen statues and observed my handiwork.

I explained the spell as we levitated the men a safe distance apart from each other and lined them up in a row facing into the room like garden sculptures frozen in comical relief.

I stroked Severus' face and kissed his split and bruised lips "_My hero_" I murmured.

"_Young love_" Narcissa sighed just before she slapped Lucius' face and then caressed Harry's. "_He's rather cute don't you think_?"

We both laughed at that and I wished that the circumstances were different and we could be friends. It would be so nice if we were just two women having a spot of brunch on a sunny Sunday morning together.

I cast a binding spell before I unfroze the men and they all stumbled into their former action and fell flat on the floor groaning. It was really quite comical to watch.

"_Enough_" Narcissa shouted in a commanding voice. "_This finishes here and now_."

There were murmured sounds of assent and Remus and Severus managed to get up on their knees. Harry groaned and Draco whimpered. Lucius was trying to crawl away but was being rather unsuccessful in his bid for freedom.

I unbound the men and rushed over to hug Severus falling onto my knees in front of him. He clutched me close and kissed my whole face before descending on my lips and knocking me to the floor in his relief. We lay on the rug kissing and caressing each other and moaning in pleasure. Harry turned his back and covered his ears whilst Draco watched intently.

"_Get a room you two_" Remus said as he helped Lucius up off the floor.

Eventually we stopped the kissing and managed to stand up though Severus didn't release me from his hold.

Lucius looked sullen. Narcissa was scolding him whilst she healed his scratches and was telling him to apologise to us. By the sounds of the discussion he didn't seem to want to do as he was told and then Draco joined in the family discussion.

They pulled away from Lucius and both took an arm each as they frog-marched the sullen Malfoy towards us. He just stared at Severus and I with his black eye and swollen lip, his hair very messy. Narcissa eventually elbowed him in the ribs to jolt him into action.

"_Sorry_" he mumbled.

"_Well, that was unconvincing_" I replied holding Severus still so he wouldn't attack Lucius again.

"_Alright, I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have taken your wife Severus and I'm sorry OK!_" he almost shouted out.

He stared at Severus, and Severus stared back at him. They had both puffed themselves up to their full heights and glared obstinately daring the other to break first.

"_You should keep him on a shorter lead_" Severus said to Narcissa. She nodded, kissed me on the cheek then led Lucius away towards the stairs.

Severus watched the pair leave then turned to Draco when he felt a hand on his arm.

"_Look I'm really sorry this happened Severus, I'll call the doctor and get him put into rehab for a bit_" he released Severus' arm and turned as the chattering sound of Kitty returning with his son was heard from the French doors.

It was then that we decided to leave Malfoy Manor for the relative safety of Hogwarts and I took hold of Severus' hand as we all flooed back to the Castle.

An interesting start to my honeymoon, hopefully the rest of my vacation would be less exciting and I could spend some quality time with my husband.


End file.
